Judge — February 10, 1906 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUNCTURED! “There! 1 guess that's the last time those big-bugs will attempt to run me down with their pesky buzz-wagon.” A MESSAGE FOR MAMMA. se HARRY, dear," said young Mrs. Bryde to her husband as he was putting on his overcoat to go to his office, «I wish that you would go around by papa’s house on your way down town this morn- ing and carry a little message to mamma for me, Will you, dear?” What husband of a month could say nay to such a sweetly-prof- fered request? Bryde could not, rushed as he was, and when he had told his wife to give him the message for her mamma she said, «Well, just stop at the door and tell mamma that I'm not sure whether I'll come around to go to the De Lancys’ tea with her this afternoon or not; but if I conclude to go I'll be there by say half-past three or—no; I don’t think I'd get there quite so early. You might say a quarter of four, and it may be four before I get there, if I go at all, and I'm not sure that I will; but tell her that if I conclude to go I'll be there in good season. I may, after all, go around real early, for mamma always likes to have me look her over when she dresses to go out. Tell her I said for her to be sure and wear her new silver-gray crépe du chine instead of her black velvet, for the gray is so becoming to her, and she looks a little sallow in her black velvet. Tell her I may not get there until a little after four, because, if I go at all, I may make a call or two before I get around to the house to go to the tea, and if it looks like rain I don’t think we'd better go; but if I go I'll get there in good season, and tell her that if she wears the crépe du chine she must be sure to wear her bonnet with those rich ruby-red roses on it—they go so well with her gray dress. But of course I can tell her that after I get there, only you might speak of it, and then she could have the bonnet on, and that would save time if ! happened to be a little late; but tell her I won't keep her waiting later than half-past four, and if I'm not there by that time she'd better go without me. But I rather think I'll go, and if 1 do— Oh, there goes your car, dear ‘THE LATEST VERSION. ETER, Peter, pumpkin-eater, Hated wifey, so he beat her. She hastened to Sioux Falls, S. D., Because she'd no more use for he. SHE HATH ALL SEASONS FOR HER OWN. Se MY DEAR.” says the trusting wife, “1 saw a perfect love of a hat down town to-day and had it sent home for your approval.” “Hat!” shouts the brutal hus- band ; hat! here it is midwinter and you've be- gun talking new hats, Thundera. tion! It isn’t time to think about new hats for two months.” “My love,” gently responds the trusting wife, “you ought to know by this time that any week in the year is the right week for a woman to get a new hat it she sees one she wants.” Great guns, woman ! A DIFFICULT CASE. Witticus—«1 would send Muggsby a comic valentine, only "“—— Gitticus— Only what Wilticus—« Only 1 can’t find any that aren’t handsomer than Muggsby.”” THE IDIOTIC JOKER. The observant individual— How high in the air the telephone company strings its wires !"" The idiotic joker—“ Ves. versation.” Evidently it wants to keep up the con- AT THE INTELLIGENCE BUREAU. comicbooks.com