Judge — September 2, 1905 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED WEF Ar ram Panxen Bortprc, Fourrm AVENUE axD Wastaxy Avvexrisxc Ornice—1313 Hartford Building, Chicago, It. TERMS TO SUBSCRIDER: > STATES AND CANADA tharteen weeks. Tnclading the Cunistuas Juoce. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all foreign countries in the postal union, $4.50 year. EvRorEan sates-acewrs—Intermational News Company, Bream's building, Chancery Lane, F.C, London ; Brentano's, Avenue de I" Opera, Paris: Saarback's News Exchange, Mains, Germany, The contents of FUDGE are protected by copyright in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and digorousty prosecuted. CONTRIBUTORS mast inclose a stamsed and self-addressed erfreiove «with all manascrints, othePiwise return of the Latter when found imavailaNe cannot be guaranteed. DRA‘VINGS and all contribations sent to the Art Department shorld have the sender's full name and address Werttten plainly on each and every separate sketch. The accompanying fohe or descriptive letter-press should in very instance be written upon its indrosdual picture, and NOT upon a separate slip of paper. Inclosure of stamps to the fall amount of postage 1s also required. 10 Insure safe and prompt return of malerial not accepted. HOW UNCLE SAM TREATED M. WITTE. M WITTE has exhibited no little pleasure and satisfaction at the cordial- * ity of his reception in this country. We venture no invidious com- parisons, but the noted Russian has surely had a taste of the frank equality of the American spirit. The greeting was as many-sided as our national life. The president and some other of our notables shook hands with the big envoy; boys climbed into trees at Portsmouth and shouted ‘* Three cheers for Witte!” as he went by in his auto; the farmer hitched old Dobbin to the vegetable-wagon, piled in the wife and the younkers, and drove into town to see and cheer the Russian; and the summer girls, one hundred strong, serenaded him at his hotel with such sim- ple melodies as ‘* How 'd you like to spoon with me?” Mr. Witte, it is said, has been immensely tickled with all this. Whether he has ever, or could have, been treated with like sportive friendliness in his own country we do not know. The pose of rank in monarchical societies is usually too stiff and stilted to admit of such gay informalities. The mass must not grow familiar. At any rate, Uncle Sam’s treatment of the czar’s plenipotentiary has given him a fair sample of the way we “ mix” things in an unterrified democracy. eee FIALA is safe out of the arctics, and thus another north-pole book is practically assured. F THE CZAR—and others—who shudder at a “‘ shameful peace”” could only get up a little shudder over something shameful in war, civilization might move up a peg. eas WHY NOT HANG A LITTLE AT_A TIME? ‘HE AUTHOR of “‘ The Breadwinners”” in 1884 wrote to the Critic that he had been recommended as a fit subject for the hangman. A sym- posium was then in progress in that journal on the question whether authors should receive their pay in a lump sum or in installments scattered through years. Mr. Hay (for it was doubtless he) expressed a preference for the installment plan, in view of the reward he deserved, as stated above. This suggestion should now be ripe for a crusade. JUDGE would be glad to be in the van of the fight. Since the public conscience is balking at hanging, and justice is getting so chicken-hearted that criminals can no longer be quietly and expeditiously choked to death, we commend the more humane and effectual method of hanging a little at a time. When we hang a man promptly and fully the incident speedily passes out of mind and the moral effect is soon lost. Rather than hang the better sort of criminals— the big, prosperous criminals whose social stand- ing is properly vouched—we let them go scot free. All these difficulties are met by the simple practice of summoning the criminal to court, say on the first day of each month, and giving him a little twist of the rope—a physically harmless but morally powerful squeeze. This would make the admonition self-perpetuating. There could never - be any risk about this. As soon asa little evi- dence was in we could hang the guilty man a little; as the evidence accumulated we could hang him a little more. If at any time the man’s innocence was established we would stop hang- ing him, and the ghost of an irremediable in- justice would never rise to haunt us, as often happens under the present practice. For a very bad man a rope might be constantly worn, and every passer-by might give ita little Jerk. It is to the interest of all our financial and political people who may be in danger of going wrong to take up this scheme and push it along. SSCQRAFT, greed and gold” is the way it’s taking shape for campaign purposes in spite of history’s warnings against alliterative slogans. A GREAT DEAL of sympathy is being expressed for wives deserted by their husbands, but not a word for poor husbands left lorn and lone- some by flitting helpmeets. SoHE BIGGEST CROPS the nation ever saw," report the forecasters. The New York Evening Post has already jumped on nature for this show of favoritism to the Republican party. T IS RUMORED that Mr. Rockefeller will give $100,000,000 to Chicago University. We haven’t any reason for saying this, but we might as well get in on the guessing same as the other papers. FANEUIL HALL, Boston’s cradle of liberty, built with tainted money! Old Peter Faneuil’s pile came from illegal traffic in liquor. Next thing we'll hear that Plymouth Rock is tainted and the Boston bean a fraud. How the sacred things are slipping from us! AMERICANS AND THE MOB MIND. ‘THERE MAY be something in the statement of Dr. Edward Ross that “ the mob mind is prevalent in America.” At least, we ought to look into the matter. The signs of the ‘mob mind,” according to Dr. Ross, are the “crazed running after the latest sensation, whether it be a travel- ing evangelist or tiddledywinks,” faddism, which is the craving for up-to- dateness and attacks the “soft and sap-headed,” city life, the daily paper, etc. The faddy, the fanciful, the crazy then seize upon the soft and the sappy-headed, and these are the product of degenerate city life, and the daily paper keeps the whole mass in a giddy whirl. That the daily paper keeps the restless flotsam and jetsam of our modern life always in view, the rotten hulks and wreckage that float evermore in the surf of our cities, is not to be doubted. That the same daily paper gives a lurid currency to trite phrases that appear to be pregnant with por- tent is likewise certain. “Race suicide” is an example. It follows that a host of people take their cue from these panicky views and imagine many dangerous and disquieting things. But beyond the surf is the limitless expanse of the ocean, and in the deeps of our national life is a sound public sentiment. A few flighty women are leaving their babies to chase butterflies, but patient and loving motherhood is still the rule. A few men have gone money-mad, others are snared in the labyrinths of graft, and others still are showing the vagaries of irresponsible wealth, while fortunes that have cost no honest sweat uni- formly run to sap-headedness. But the millions are still faithful to normal ideals and unspoilt by fads and greed. ose RE THE reciprocity people aiming to keep up the tariff fight by naming their issue the “dual tariff”? se\VOMEN are driving men from all the occupations,” says a census expert. Well, the men ought to be satisfied, just so the work gets done. eee R. ROCKEFELLER turning himself out to grass by way of taking the Kneipp cure should be warned by the exploit of a certain ancient king whose name, in short, was Neb. eee R. WHITELAW REID has added a country house to the ambas- sadorial layoutpresumably to advertise to the Britishers what a bang-up paying property the New York Tribune is. comicbooks.com