Judge — August 19, 1905 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

OUTING OF THE ABDALLAHS—A SHORT CHRONICLE OF THE SHORE. CHAPTER I. Now. it fell out on the fifteenth day of the seventh month, which is between the former and the latter rains, that Abdallah, the Assistant of the Boss Pen-wiper to the Pasha, and a mighty man in that land, betook himself with all his house to the shore for to seek some rest, he and all his house. 2. For the hot term was come, and this was the custom of the land. And they gat them up and hastened eastward, and the place whither they went is where the sea meets the dry land and the summer girl in her never-get-wet bathing-suit_makes glad the eyes of thousands. 3. And in the land toward which they journeyed, close by the vast saltness, dwelt one Sheik Ibrahim, a great and mighty man and the owner of many cottages. 4. And he was called the mighty Hoojoo, for, behold! is it not written that he hoojooed the populace for many years ? 5. Now, it came to pass that when Abdallah was yet a great way off Sheik Ibrahim saw him and smiled a large number-ten smile, for he beheld that Abdallah was indeed well off, having his salary for two weeks sewed inside his vest. 6. And Abdallah drew near and made obeisance unto Sheik Ibra- him, and offered him a cigar and other costly presents, including a never-go-out match, 7. Then he lifted up his voice and spake unto the Sheik and said, 8. Most mighty Cawolloper and chief swiper of hard-earned cash, what is the price of yon gorgeous bungalow with the Corinthian front and rich Etruscan sweep of portico 2” g. And Sheik Ibrahim made answer and said, ** Brave and worthy hero from Hackensack, I will first ask you a question and then we may more quickly come at the matter in hand. How are you fixed for cash, and about how much did you bring with you on this occasion ?” 10, **Good Lord,” saith Abdallah, ++ Twill tell you truth when I say that I have with me but ten talents of silver and some fine gold. Behold, here is a writing with one Moses Eisenstein, who gaveth me an-accommodation. Look for yourself and see that I speak only true words."" And the Sheik looked and saw that he had spoken truly. « Then said Sheik Ibrahim unto Have you return tickets?” «I saith Abdallah. Then was Sheik Ibrahim for a moment buried in deep thought, and for above the space of four seconds spake he not. And his lips moved as if he was subtracting one sum from another and adding another there- to. Then he opened his mouth and spake unto Abdallah and said, 12. The rent of the beautiful board shack which standeth close by the sea, within a day's walk, will be ten talents of silver and the fine gold you mentioned aforetime, except that you may keep one, bone thereof, so that you be not entirely stript of cash, This is a special price to you. To anybody else it would be more, but to you, in your poverty, it shall be at the price named, which, as I figure it, will just about let you out; for you say you have tickets already with which to get home. And it was so. “How much have you got?” the wetness." CHAPTER II. 1. Thus, on the evening of the fifteenth day of the seventh month, Abdallah and all his household, his wife, his sons and daughters, his man-servants and maid-servants, his dog, cat, seven trunks, baby-car- riage, a packing-box and much goods, moved into the cottage by the sea. 2. And the name thereof painted upon the front in large green letters was ‘* Ocean View," because by walking three blocks east and turning to the left and strolling another four blocks, the ocean could be plainly seen on a clear day with a field-glass. “And they gat them up and hoisted umbrellas and dodged 3. And no sooner were they within their new abode than a g.eat cry arose for something to eat, and hunger was abroad in that house and famine prevailed to a great extent. 4. Then spake Mistress Abdallah and said, ++ Bestir thyself. Make a fire in that stove, then rustle out to the stores and get provisions, lest thee and all thy house starve.” And Abdallah did so. 5. But lo! the stove was balky and the fire would not burn; for behold, Noah had cussed that stove aforetime, when he gave it to Melchizedek, and Mel had paid his respects to it before he traded it to Nebuchadnezzar, and Neb had a crack at it before he went forth to chew grass in the plains of Esdraelon, and the cracks are there to this day. 6. Then returned Abdallah, laden with sliced ham and eggs, but- ter, milk and much other truck, and he looked, and behold, the house was full of smoke—so much so that Mount Pelée would have hidden its head for shame in comparison. 7. Then Abdallah swore and gat him forth into the street and sat in sackcloth and ashes, and cursed the day he was born, and said, + Behold this is vacation and I am resting and having an exceeding great time—yes !” 8. Then came forth Mrs. Abdallah from the house, and when she saw him she was exceeding wroth and smote her head and cried aloud and said, ++ If I put out a sign and advertised to be a man I would be ‘one and not the nub-end of nothing. g. “Get you into the house with a great degree of suddenness and divide with me the happiness of this occasion." And Abdallah did so. CHAPTER IIL 1, Now, it came to pass that when Abdallah had supped, and they that were with him, he went forth to sit by the sea for a brief space, he and all his house, and the waves were exceedingly scrump- tious, and the moon rose and threw a shimmering turnpike of loveli- ness across the billowing murk, and Abdallah rejoiced exceedingly thereat and said, ++ It comes high, but the show certainly is up to the bills.” 2. Then they gat them home to + Ocean View,” and with one accord they all went to bed. And Abdallah was weary, and he slept like a cast-iron dog, he and all his house, and the morning and the evening were the first day at the shore. 3. And when it was come to the sixth hour of the night, behold, a large, purple, maroon cloud gathered, and rain fell with great heartiness and una- nimity, but Abdallah wist not that it was so, for he slept. 4. And some several barrels of moistness presently gathered and fell through the open-work roof of + Ocean View,” and it smote Abdallah in the eye and trickled down his wife's bosom, and splashed round over the little Ab- dallahs, and soaked into the back hair of the maid-servants. 5. And it was so that in about three jerks of a lamb's tail they all with one accord awoke and began to wist that things were so, and there was some tall cussin’ for above the space of an hour, insomuch that the world could not con- tain the books if it should all be written. 6. And they gat them up and hoist- ed umbrellas and dodged the wetness and spoke freely of the situation until dawn, and the sun arose and the night was forgotten, And they abode in that place for some time, 7. And made merry continually, and likewise did the sand-tick and the red ant and the mosquito, and the sunburn and the misfit food, and they altogether had a perfect picnic. 8. Thus did Abdallah, and more, too, in the place by the sea which is called Youholdhimwhileltakehiswad, or the Spring of Refreshing. g. And lo! the memory of that outing abode with them many months, and Abdallah speaketh to certain of the neighbors and saith: to. ++I would it were already summer again, that I might hie me to the shore, for behold, we are born to trouble as the sparks fly up- ward.” . 11, And it was even so, and, if anything, more so, as it is written: They that have the price shall suffer these things, for this is according to Hoyle. PERKIN WAKBECK. comicbooks.com