Judge — July 15, 1905 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

SSF —_—I"—_ 7 Cay PUBLISHED WEEKLY Ax ume Paneer Burtprxc, Fourrm AVENUE axp NixerKexta Sraxer, New Youre. Wasraxx Apvixrisinc Orrice—1313 Hartford Building, Chicago, lit unr TERMS TO SUBSCRIBER: STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE. Ove copy, one year,orssnumbers= = = =e ‘copy, #ix month sorsomumbers - = = One: One copy, for thirteen weeks Including the Cwnistwas Jvoce. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all foreign countries in the postal union, $40 year. Evnorean sates-acents—/aternational News Company, Bream’s building, Chancery Lane, B.C, London: Brentana’s, coenne del" Opera, Pa Saurkack's News Exchange, Mains, Germany, The contents of FUDGE are protected by copyright in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this conyright toil be promptly and Pigorousty prosecuted. CONTRIBUTORS must inclose a stamped and self-addressed erfvelope ‘with all manascripts, othePivise return of the Latter when found unavailaNe cannot be guaranteed. DRAWINGS and all contributions sent to the Art Department should have the sender's full name and address Yoritten plainly on each and every separate shetch. The accompanying joke or descrintive letter-press should in ébery instance be written apon tts indoidaal picture, and NOT upon a separate slip of paper, Inclosure of stamps to the fall amount of postage (s also required. 10 acceptede Insure safe and prompt return of material not ‘THE ADMINISTRATION EXPOSED. IN THESE PIPING DAYS, when not to have exposed something or somebody is to have failed largely of the best success, it is gratifying to be able to uncover fraud in the highest places. Happy is the man (or the magazine) whose good fortune it is to make exposures among the great and the influential. Verily its (or his) lines are fallen in pleasant places. JUDGE has been eager for months to get in the procession and expose somebody. Naturally, we prefer to expose the administration. To unearth something really big and sensational there would fill our cup to overflow- ing. At last our opportunity has come. We have stumbled upon an act not great in itself, but in principle vital to the future of this republic. Some man sent a five-cent piece to Secretary Shaw and asked him to tell which was “heads”? and which “tails.” The man inclosed a nickel for a reply. Bear that in mind, please. The answer was figured out and franked to the questioner and the government focksted the nickel. Trivial? Yes; but the fall of Rome was trivial in its beginnings. If the government steals nickels under cover of its franking privileges now, what will it steal ten years from now? Kill evil in the root, say we; and we call upon the people to demand that Secretary Shaw hand that nickel back to its rightful owner. eee HIMNEYS and electric fans for the New York subway are the latest suggestions. Improvement is the order of the day. fT? BE SENT ABROAD to bring a dead one home is at least a novel way to show presidential favor. Why wouldn’t it be a good idea now to assign Mr. Bowen to escort the squire of Wantage back to his home town and thus close a disagreeable incident? ‘THE SPANK goes with the feed’” is the axiomatic residuum of the debate in Gotham on the propriety of flogging in the public schools. In other words, none but the hand that provides the slicéd bread may right- fully work the shingle whose tintinnabulous impact makes music in the world, THE TEPEE at Quogue is the only show that is trying to divide honors with the wigwam on Sagamore hill. oats 'T. LOUIS COUPLE were wed on a merry-go-round. Anything to throw a little gayety into the tottering institution of marriage. GENERAL LINEVITCH begs the czar for one more chance. Like Rojestvensky, the brave Russian wants to make a finished job of it. ITH NEW YORK’S 4,000,000 population and 6,200,000 in the metro- politan area, only the city by the lake can feel what a speck on the map a town of 2,250,008. [TIS PLEASANT to learn that Ambassador Meyer’s wife has had no Small part in bringing the czar round to the peace point of view. Thus does the sway of the American woman increase. THOUSANDS of young collegians, fresh from the halls of learning, are now gathering into the shimmering wheat-felds of Kansas and the Dakotas. Thus does education shore up the great basic industries. (CONDEMNED to death for slaying nobody knows how many wives, the last wife of Hoch is ready to sacrifice everything to save him, although her sister was among his victims. Such is the mystr y of a woman’s heart. aye ‘A PARSON listening to an atheist eleven hours for a two-hundred-and- fifty-dollar lot to build a church on Is an idea so much better than the sociable as a means of recruiting the parish funds that it is a wonder no- body has hit upon it sooner. IS IT AVARICE THAT MAKES THE AMERICAN PEOPLE CHASE THE ALMIGHTY DOLLAR? soTHE BESETTING SIN of Americans is avarice,” said Mayor McClel- lan to the graduates of Fordham university. ‘* We need fear not tainted money, but the money that taints,”” was another of his epigram- matic hits. The mayor’s eloquence is in line with most of the baccalaureate utterances of the commencement season. A graduating class that was not warned against the sin of aspiring to riches might well consider itself slighted. The plaint pervades our pulpit and all our serious literature, un- til even the common tongue is aflame with the accusation that the modern American is a selfish, grasping, avaricious, greedy sort of a person. Some- body should have the courage and knowledge sufficient to deny and dis- prove this grave charge. Never was a general indictment against an age based upon such a twisted and distorted conception of the facts. Every- body is after the dollar; therefore everybody is greedy, runs this silly logic. Why not take another and a closer, more sympathetic, look at human society and see things as they are. See the brave struggle of the mass of the people to keep above water, the striving of the millions to achieve and maintain respectability, the pathetic longingZof the multitude for just a bit of something beyond mere daily bread. Let the preachers and teachers consult their own experience with the problem of matching a small income to the thousand and one needs of a polite existence and then say whether the chase of the dollar isn’t something too fine to be classed as greed and avarice. It is easy to look upon the restless, toiling throng and its strain- ing after more of the good things of life and say, “* How greedy!” So easy that it is also easy to understand why it’s so common. When the strug- gle of the masses to maintain a solvent and respectable existence ceases the shameless beggar and ragged loafer will swarm like vermin over the country. The ceaseless diatribes against the so-called dollar-chasing of our times is but a part of that shallow-thinking reform which is everywhere slashing at the branches of the tree of evil without ever suspecting that it has roots at all. There are men who are money-mad, but the cravings of the mass for the means of a richer and more comfortable and happier life are normal and sound and not to be despised. comicbooks.com