Judge, 1904-08-06 · page 4 of 20
Judge — August 6, 1904 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated humorous pieces typical of early 20th-century Judge magazine: **"A Piscatorial Enthusiast"** features a woman recounting her fishing passion, establishing the joke that she talks about fish constantly—even imagining doing so in Horsheads, New York. **"One Difference"** presents a joke about the distinction between unmarried and married women, delivered through characters Mistah Bones and Mistah Tambo (likely referring to minstrel show traditions). **"Judge's Favorites"** and other short joke pieces fill the remaining space. **"A Bad Combination"** shows a domestic quarrel over financial support, using caricatured figures in a comic strip format. The page reflects Judge's formula: mixing theatrical references, domestic humor, and gentle social commentary aimed at middle-class readers of that era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE'S FAVORITES. ELEANOR PALK IN ‘' PARSIFALIA.”* The laurel crown you own Is one you don't inherit. It's yours because Of the applause That proves your golden merit— Your golden merit, which means simply fame And all the coin that’s anchored to the same. And this fact is well known In Boston, Quogue, Mt. Kisco, Lynn, Passadum- Keg, Muskegum, New York and San Francisco, And every other town that’s worth a rap On this or that or any other map. HOPELESS, EY done taken Sam Johnsing down ter de insane-'sylum,” says Marfy Brown. Yo" doan’ tell me! What in dis world gone wrong wid dat man 2” asks Sistah Po'teh. * Hit bin goin’ on mo’ en fo’ weeks now sence he begun ter pos'/vely ‘fuse ter eat watahmillion.” AN AGGRAVATION, Mr, Lendthings (of Swamphurst)— What are you sighing about ?" Mrs. Lendthings (gloomily)—" I was just thinking what a lot of beautiful premiums I could get if the intelligence offices would only give trading-stamps ! A PISCATORIAL ENTHUSIAST. YANK from the brooklet with verve and with vim ‘The finest of fishes that wriggle and swim— The perch and the sunfish, the chub and the trout, Within my deep basket are flopping about. From sunrise to sunset I fish, all aglow With rapture that’s finer than gold, don't you know ; Yea, finer it is than their fizz in the pan, That's heard by the ears of my old inner man, Oh, Eden 's, full often I fancy and wish, A place where I'll have naught to do but to fish Through all the bright day with my bent pin and cork And think I'm up here in old Horseheads, New York. ONE DIFFERENCE. 6YJHAT is the difference between an old maid and a married woman, Mistah Bones?” asked Mistah Tambo after the opening chorus had been trolled. “What is the difference between an old maid and a married lady 2” repeated Mistah Bones. The query also was repeated by the interlocutor. Then Mistah Bones gave it up. The old maid,” explained Mr. Tambo, “is looking for a husband every day, while the married woman is looking for him every night.” A BAD COMBINATION. * Dolly Dashaway married a poet.”* “What a combination! Is her father supporting them?” “No; he seems to have forgotten the combination.”” BEFORE THE GUN WENT OFF. Hocan—"" Here comes Casey's ould hornless goat ag'in, Begots! Ikeste1m—"* You vant to buy someding nice, mein friend ?”” he'll be headless phwin O1 shoot.” Hooan—"" Th’ quistion thot agitates me moind is, wud it be murther i Oi'd pull th’ trigger?”