Judge, 1904-04-30 · page 6 of 16
Judge — April 30, 1904 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical piece mocks the self-interested incentives of professionals—specifically lawyers and doctors. A judge and doctor converse, with each initially giving self-serving advice to the other: the doctor recommends costly, unnecessary litigation over a fence dispute; the judge prescribes an expensive appendix operation. When each reverses roles and asks for candid "man to man" advice, both instantly change their recommendations to the simplest, cheapest solutions (tear down the fence; take pepsin tablets and walk). The cartoon's title and final panel expose how professionals prioritize billable hours over clients' actual needs. The bottom panel reinforces the theme of duplicity: a man's proposal rejection stems from poor communication rather than circumstance—another failure of honesty. The satire critiques professional ethics and the profit motive corrupting advice-giving, a timeless concern.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ELLO, doctor !" * Good-morning, judge ! «How's every- thing with you, doctor ?” * All right, only that I am having an argument with my neighbor over a fence be- tween our properties. He claims it is so high as to shut off light and air from ‘ him, and threatens to sue me if I don’t lower it.” “ Interesting case, that.” “I suppose he could sue me, couldn't he?” “Oh, certainly! But you could ap- peal, and all that, you know, and carry the matter up through the courts inter- minably. It would make an absorbing piece of practice.” * But, judge, now, as man to man, tell me one thing. Just advise me as a man and not as a lawyer. What would be the simplest way out of the argu- ment “ Tear down the fence.” “Much obliged.” “Not at all. Now, maybe you'll give me achance at you. For the last couple of «lays I've had a dull pain in or near my stomach. Doesn't seem to get any worse or any better.” “Um-m-m-ha! Le'me see that tongue. “What do you make out of it, doc- tor “Looks very much as if it would lead into an attack of appendicitis. Ten or fifteen days’ preparation in charge of a thorough nurse, then an operation for the removal of the appendix, ought to bring you around all right. Of course you'd have to stay at a hospital until fully recovered.” ! 1 never thought it could less there might have to be one or two supplementary operations, Expensive— but interesting. Um-m-m-ha !" “Darned interesting, yes! Say, doctor, as man to man, now—just as we were discussing that line-fence proposi- tion a few minutes ago—what would be the simplest thing for me to do—have the operation performed, or make my will and let Nature take her course ?” “Oh, if you put it in that light, judge, to be sure it's different. Let me see that tongue again. Um! Yes—quite so. If you were fifty years younger I'd call that a stomach-ache. Nickel's worth of pepsin tablets and walk four or five blocks briskly every morning.” “Doctor, why didn't you tell me that at first?” “Um! Well, you see, we have line-fence cases in medical practice, just as you do in legal practice.” “LTsee. But I must get off here. I've got to argue an appeal before the superior court.” «I'm going on down to the hospital this morning. I have to direct an oper- ation on Mr. I. Stokk Wotters.” w. v. x. STAawlkws HOW IT HAPPENED. “Poor chap! how did he come to be refused by two girls?” Why, he didn’t let elther know he intended to propose to the other."* comicbooks.com