Judge, 1904-02-13 · page 8 of 20
Judge — February 13, 1904 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humorous pieces typical of early 20th-century American satirical magazines: **"Carrying Out the Simile"** mocks romantic idealism. A woman compares love to tobogganing—thrilling initially, then requiring hard work. Her escort bluntly replies that marriage means "pulling the toboggan up-hill with the girl on the toboggan," suggesting women become burdens. The joke reflects period anxieties about marriage's realities versus romantic expectations. **Other pieces** satirize everyday life: a sandwich vendor's uncertainty about freshness; a father's dismay that his daughter's suitor demanded to know his wealth before accepting her valentine; a couple choosing February 29th (Leap Year) for their wedding to avoid annual reminders; and an Irishman (indicated by dialect spelling) worried his doctor will overcharge after seeing his bank-book. These jokes assume readers share skepticism about romance, immigrants, doctors, and gold-diggers—typical Judge humor reflecting period class attitudes and gender dynamics.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
CARRYING OUT THE SIMILE, H!" SIGHED the romantic lady as she and her escort stood at the top of the toboggan-slide at Montreal, “how much love resembles tobogganing! At first } there is the pondering over the choice of a mate; then the settling down and coming to an under- standing as to the rules of the game; and then to- gether the happy couple sail far, far away, thinking of nothing except the delight and joy of being to- gether.” “Yes,” answered her practical escort; “and then comes marriage.” “Oh, yes,” she simpered. — “Yes, then comes marriage. That consists in pulling the toboggan up-hill with the girl on the toboggan.” There was no thaw that day. HERE are some people who can’t resist the suspicion that Oppor- tunity is trying to sell them a gold-brick. WASN'T QUITE SURE. Passencer—* Are your sandwiches fresh?" Sanpwicu-soy—''I don’t know, mister; I've omy been here three days.” SAYS PAPA: MY DAUGHTER asked the count To be her valentine. He first asked the amount Of money that was mine And then he whispered yes, So now I'm feeling blue. It's up to me, I guess, To pay the postage due. ADVANTAGE OF LEAP-YEAR. SeTHEY are going to be married on the twenty- finth of February.” “Sensible couple.” “In what way 2?” “Why, the date will not constantly be coming up to remind them of the occasion.” ILLUSTRATED NEWS NOTE. Mr. Jones, of the riding-club, entered and rode his horse ‘* Rinky Dink" in the Bilgeville Derby, but was unplaced. RIGHT IN LINE FOR EXPENSE. Mrs. Casey—"' The docthor says ye hov appendikitis, Tim.”* Mr. Casey—"' Och, Norah, Norah! whoy wor ye so foolish as to show him yure bank-book ?” comicbooks.com