Judge, 1904-01-23 · page 12 of 18
Judge — January 23, 1904 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple satirical vignettes typical of late-19th/early-20th-century American humor: **"The Explanation"**: Jokes about newly wealthy Americans (nouveaux riches) marrying into European nobility to gain legitimacy and old-family prestige—a common target of satire about American social climbing. **"Accurate"** and **"Parliamentary Ruling"**: Brief gags about literal misunderstandings and wordplay, typical filler humor. **"His First Grand Opera"**: Rural character (Joe Backwoods) mistakes an orchestral performance for an emergency, satirizing rural/urban cultural divides. **"The Happy Future"**: Middle-class couple's optimism that their cheap current possessions will eventually become valuable antiques—poking fun at consumerism and false hope. **"Couldn't Bluff Him"**: Uncle Hosea recounts a drummer defying a conductor's authority, celebrating working-class resistance to hierarchy. **"Worse Than the Sickness"**: Irish immigrant complains that the whiskey remedy prescribed for illness is itself unbearable—ethnic humor playing on stereotypes about Irish drinking. The page demonstrates Judge's range: class satire, regional humor, and ethnic caricature typical of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE EXPLANATION. Se LTE IS one of the nou- veaux riches.” “Is he? I thought he was a European nobleman of a very old family.” “ That's it-—didn’t have acent until he got married.” ACCURATE. 46CIR,” says the Boston reporter, “ our office is informed that your purse was stolen from you last night. Is there anything in it?” “Not by this time, doubtless,” answers Mr. Emerson Waldo Beeneeter, relapsing into an attitude of perturbed meditation. PARLIAMENTARY RULING. NT 5a SHE SAID he could not J Dr. Tee help kissing you,” Ai ta fi whispered the first con- gressman’s daughter. “ He said when he sat beside you in the conservatory and looked into your eyes he was moved by an irresisti- ble impulse and simply had to kiss you.” “Did he 2?" smiled the second congressman's daughter, who was listening with some interest to the apology thus being made for the holiness of the handsome cousin of the other girl. “Yes, He said it was your eyes that won him, He "—— “ Well, he'll have to come around and correct the minutes of that meeting. The eyes won it, but the nose got it.” HIS FIRST GRAND OPERA. Jos Backwooos—" Now, what's up? Be they yellin’ fire?" His son—"' No: they're singing a duet entitled ‘The gentle voice of love.’ ‘THERE ARE OTHERS. 6O\YVJHAT kind of a chap Ww is he 2” “Oh, his conversation consists of twenty-eight-dol- lars’ worth of talking to every nickel’s worth of horse sens THE HAPPY FUTURE. Mrs. Waggles —» Ex- erything we have here in the house is so old it is gles—" Have a lit- tle patience, my dear. When they get a little older they will be antique.” COULDN'T BLUFF HIM. se]T WAS right funny,” said Uncle Hosea, tell- ing of the orchestral con- in’ feller set in the middle, an’ all ter oncet the little man at the end o’ the line hit the big drum a sassy rap. Well, the smart-aleck feller shakes a little stick at the drummer, an’ what does he do but hit her up ag‘in jest ter show he was as good as the next man. An’, by jinks! he didn’t take no back talk—or, rather, no orders—from the smart-aleck man, because he jest kept on a-whackin’ that big drum in spite o° the boss’s shakin’ that stick, as if to say he'd catch it if he didn’t quit. Yes, sir; I gloried in his spunk, if he was little. An’ at the end o' the tune he whooped it up on that drum harder than ever. A little man fer nerve every time.” —_ mi a cert. “A smart-aleck look- Sf) LEE WORSE THAN THE SICKNESS. Mrs. Hattoran—"' Th’ docthor sez ye are to hov wan shpoonful av whiskey In a toombler av wather iviry two hours." Mr. HaLtoran—"* As if Oi wasn’t sooferin’ enough alriddy widout sich a prescription as thot!"" comicbooks.com ‘<s s Cin ad ok ak