Judge, 1904-01-23 · page 10 of 18
Judge — January 23, 1904 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page collects brief satirical sketches typical of late 19th/early 20th-century American humor. Key targets include: **"The Explanation"**: Mocks newly wealthy Americans (nouveaux riches) who lack aristocratic lineage—a common anxiety among the social-climbing middle class. **"Accurate"**: Plays on the stereotype of Boston reporters as precise but pedantic. **"Parliamentary Ruling"**: A congressman's daughter uses a suggestive anecdote to test whether congressmen have standards; the implication is they don't. **"There Are Others"** and **"The Happy Future"**: Mock middle-class social pretension and self-deception. **"His First Grand Opera"**: Rural dialect humor (Uncle Hosea) where an unsophisticated drummer ignores a conductor's stick—valuing independence over deference to authority. **"Worse Than the Sickness"**: Irish immigrant dialect humor: Mr. Halloran finds the whiskey cure for illness worse than the illness itself—playing on period stereotypes about Irish drinking. The page reflects Judge's typical blend of class satire, ethnic humor, and gentle social commentary aimed at educated readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE EXPLANATION. 4¢LJE IS one of the nou- veaux riches.” w'Is he? [thought he was a European nobleman of a very old family.” « That's it-—didn’t have acent until he got married.” ACCURATE, 46CIR,” says the Boston reporter, “ our office is informed that your purse was stolen from you last night. Is there anything in it?” “Not by this time, answers Mr, ‘aldo Beeneeter, relapsing into an attitude of perturbed meditation. PARLIAMENTARY RULING. S+LTE SAID he could not help kissing you,” whispered the first con- gressman’s daughter. “ He said when he sat beside you in the conservatory and looked into your eyes he was moved by an irresisti- ble impulse and simply had to kiss you.” Josu Bacxwooos—"* THERE ARE OTHERS. SO\JHAT kind of a chap aD Ww is he 2” “Oh, his conversation consists of twenty-eight-dol- lars’ worth of talking to every nickel’s worth of horse sense.” aaa LE LEE AK THE HAPPY FUTURE. Mrs. Waggles — Ex- erything we have here in the house is so old it is shabby.” Waggles—" Have a lit- tle patience, my dear. When they get a little older they will be antique.” SK oS COULDN'T BLUFF HIM. s6]T WAS right funny,” said Uncle Hosea, tell- ing of the orchestral con- cert. A smart-aleck look- in’ feller set in the middle, an’ all ter oncet the little man at the end o’ the line hit the big drum a sassy rap. Well, the smart-aleck feller shakes a little stick at the drummer, an’ what does HIS FIRST GRAND OPERA. f fi he do but hit her up ag'in Now, what's up? Be they yellin’ fire ?"" His son—' No; they're singing a duet entitled ‘ The gentle voice of love.’ jest ter show he was as good as the next man. An’, Did he?” smiled the second congressman's daughter, who was _ by jinks! he didn’t take no back talk—or, rather, no orders—from the listening with some interest to the apology thus being made for the smart-aleck man, because he jest kept on a-whackin’ that big drum in boldness of the handsome cousin of the other girl. “Yes. He said it was your eyes that won him. spite o° the boss's shakin’ that stick, as if to say he'd catch it if he He "— didn’t quit. Yes, sir; I gloried in his spunk, if he was little. An’ at « Well, he'll have to come around and correct the minutes of that the end o’ the tune he whooped it up on that drum harder than ever. meeting. The eyes won it, but the nose got it.” \ ie A little man fer nerve every time.” Oo. WORSE THAN THE SICKNESS. Mrs. Hattorat—"'Th’ docthor sez ye are to hov wan shpoonful av whiskey in a toombler av wather iviry two hours." Mr. HALLonan—"* As if Oi wasn’t sooferin’ enough alriddy widout sich a prescription as thot!" comicbooks.com