Judge, 1903-11-28 · page 6 of 21
Judge — November 28, 1903 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page celebrates Thanksgiving through multiple satirical pieces, all centered on turkeys as the holiday's main subject. **"A Bird-Song"** is a poem humorously ranking birds by cultural importance, concluding that while peacocks, swans, and eagles are admired year-round, "the turkey is it"—meaning the turkey alone defines a specific holiday and moment of glory. **"A Barnyard Conversation"** depicts a pompous turkey-gobbler pontificating about urban sociology to a turkey-hen, who cynically reveals she overheard city boarders discussing how tough, stringy turkeys are relegated to cold storage before Thanksgiving—undermining his pretentious philosophizing with the grim reality that turkeys are primarily valued as food. The lower cartoon, **"Overheard at the Thanksgiving Dance,"** uses racial dialect humor (common in early-20th-century Judge) to joke about a woman's multiple marriages, with women wondering how she attracts husbands without "offering inducements." The page also includes lighter content: theatrical reviews, puns about awning-makers running "shady" businesses, and jokes about turkeys trying various schemes (eating muscle-building food) to avoid their fate.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A BIRDSONG. + J the first days of spring, When the world takes the plow, Robin redbreast is king Of the lawn and the bough. Later on does each mead Ring with linnet and lark, While the sweet thrushes lead The big band in the park. We applaud every lay As is proper and fit, But we've come to the day When the turkey is it. ‘A most wonderful tail Does the peacock unfold ; The swan’s grace do we hail, And the eagle is bold. What miladi would do For a ruff and a hat If no ostriches grew— Can you picture me that? Love-birds whisper of bliss, And the parrot has But there's one day—it's this— When the turkey is it. I'ma sad sybarite For plump quail, and will pack Any day, any night, To go shoot canvas-back. But there’s one day each year, Near the end of the fall, When small birds are small beer ‘And the big have the call. Come ye, master and dame, HE TOOK HIS PEN IN HAND. A BARNYARD CONVERSATION. 6s]T IS the opinion of eminent sociologists,” said the philosophic gobbler, « that the tougher clement of Here's good fun, you'll admit— 'Tis the Thanksgiving game, And the turkey is 7!" kowann w aanwarD, JUDGE'S FAVORITES. VIRGINIA EARLE IN "SERGEANT KITTY." She skips about In airy style; ‘She's never in one place, But everywhere at once, the while Each skip 's a skip of grace. ‘She's happiest when the tra-la-loo She gayly whirls and wings, And we're all happiest through ard through The moment that she sings. HIS RUSE. First turkey—« Gobbler is a pretty slick article.” Second turkey—" What is he up to now 2” First turkey—* Stole a pack- age of breakfast-food and eats . some every morning to develop his muscles.” SOME chronic _grumblers find fault with a phonograph on the TESTING IT. “Oh, yes: I write a bit of verse occasionally and then read it to my friends." “And then?” the country inevitably drifts to- ward the larger cities.” “Yes,” answered the up-to- date turkey-hen. “I overheard one of the city boarders say this summer that it was strange the leathery, stringy turkeys always were sent to the cold-storage houses to be held for the Thanks. giving rush.” SHADY. HE RUNS a shady business— No, he is not a fakir ; Nor does he deal a faro-game— He is an awning-maker. THE Light Brigade was making its famous charge. “This is bully!" exclaimed the soldiers as they rushed smil- ingly to death, “Seems like the good old college-football days.” With a final ‘Rah, ‘rah, ‘rah !" they gave as close an imi- ground that it lacks originality. * Well, If they still remain friendly I send it to an editor." tation as possible of the real thing. OVERHEARD AT THE THANKSGIVING DANCE. Mrs. Parkah ts suttinly habin’ hahd luck in gittin’ husban’s. She's had foah—hasn’t she, Mistah Cuttah?”* ‘Yes; an’ had ter take in washin' ter suppoht dem."* ; ‘Well, fo’ de lan’s sake! how do yo" s'pose she git all dem husban’s ef she don't offah inducements?” comicbooks.com