Judge — October 24, 1903 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHAT THE TROUBLE WAS. Now, just let me see : Seems to me that ‘twas she Objected to something That he did ; or he Objected to her having Some one to tea— No! Now isn’t that queer? I know I did hear Just the way that it was, But it's left me, I fear! IF ITS Red No! It comes to me now. It seems this was the how Of it: Something he did That she wouldn't allow— Or was it her old folks That started the row ? No! now that isn’t right, I know that's not quite The way that Miss Gadaround Told me last night. Ah! now I recall The gossip and all. It seems that one night When he went there to call— ~ "Twas last spring, [ think, Or was it this fall ? Oh, well, any way, What I started to say Was that she—well! My memory’s awful to-day ! ITS RIGHT Sam— Mose Jackson doan’ blebe det | rabbit's foot brings good luck enny mo’.”| Remus—* Why not?” Sam— Bekase de kernal’s bull-dog bit away de berry pocket he was carryin’ it in."—Chicago News, Now, how did she tell Me that? Well, well, well, well ! You know she got her story Right straight from Nell ; But I can’t just recall now Just what she did tell Me last night. Any way, Whichever it may Be, the wedding is off, as I started to say ! —Bismarck Tribune. “TL never did ride in one er dese auto- mobiles,” said Brother Dickey; en what's mo’, I ain't gwine ter. [wuz bo'n in hol- lerin’ distance er de ox team, en though hit go slow, ef you only starts airly enough you'll git ter de cane grindin’ en never miss de train, I never did hear er any oxens runnin’: away wid folks; kase it takes ‘em half a day ter make up dey minds ter go, en de yuther half ter wish dey hadn't never started !"—Allanta Con- stitution, Now must we sigh when daylight goes, Now must we grieve when droops the ros: Too near the hour—ah, sorrows dole !— When we must muse on high-priced coal. —The New Times. WE OFFER FOR SALE $ A Limited Number of the Original WATER-COLOR SKETCHES used as Cover Designs for Sis Hopkins’ Own Book At TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS Each The captivating and bewitching originality displayed in the clever character impersonations of “SIS HOPKINS” is artistically portrayed in these sketches. 3 HA Proofs will be sent on application, or the originals may be seen at the office of JUDGE COMPANY, 225 Fourth Avenue, New York * SHAVING SOAP WILLIA COLLEGE STUDENTS are pretty good judges of «what’s what,” and usually manage to have about the best of everything. The fact that nine out of ten use Wil- ’ liams’ Shaving Soap, is convinc- ing evidence of its superiority. Sold in Sbaving Sticks and Shoving Tablets throug bout the world. ‘THE J. B. WILLIAMS CO., Glastonbury, Conn. ARs or) “Yes,” he said, “I get my looks from| “Talk about big jobs,” said the cheer- my mother and my brains from my father."| ful idiot, while trying to look serious — “I'm sorry you told me this,” she said.| _“* Well,” said the victim wearily. “Why 2" “ Wheeling West Virginia may be some “ Because it gives me the impression | and Lansing Michigan may be rather a that your parents were painfully lacking | big surgical undertaking ; but Flushing in generosity to their only child.” Cleve-| Long island isn't such a tiny little sanitary land Plain Dealer. stunt."—Baltimore American, Well! Well! oe Have you seen’em? ONLY 4 DIME each, but worth a dollar Jim Jones’es Joke Book What Si Perkins Saw Joel Jarvis’s Jay Jokes Sis Hopkins’ Own Book Ten cents each or forty cents for the greatest bunch of side- splitting joke books you ever saw. They all have 'em! Ask your newsdealer or newsboy on the train, or send direct to JUDGE COMPANY, 225 Fourth Avenue, New York comicbooks.com