Judge, 1903-10-03 · page 4 of 16
Judge — October 3, 1903 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several humor pieces typical of early Judge magazine: **"A Smoker's Joy"** celebrates tobacco's pleasures through romantic imagery and verse. **"Nothing to Be Said"** presents a joke about a newlywed couple's marital discord—the husband stayed out late, making his wife unhappy after only two months of marriage. The humor relies on the audience finding domestic tension amusing. **"Judge's Favorites"** quotes an actress (Lotta Faust) from a theatrical production about performance. **"A Provident Four-Year-Old"** shows a child's pragmatic prayer, avoiding religious obligations. **"Seeing New York"** appears to reference urban sightseeing, with commentary about copper and hunting. **"Useless"** depicts a rural/country scene with dialect humor about fencing graveyards and burying grounds. The content reflects period attitudes toward marriage, religion, and rural/urban divides.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A SMOKER’S JOY. [ SMOKE my dear old pipe all day, ‘And watch the blue wreaths blow away. All sorts of things, with paws and wings, Are drifting in the purple spray. I dachshunds see on nimble feet Go gliding down some dreamy street. Oh, soon in links they'll be, methinks, Converted into sausage-meat. All life's cares nonsense seem, and stuff, And fate's attacks I quick rebuff, Though the Lone Jack, alas, alack! Is but skunk-cabbage that I puff. NOTHING TO BE SAID. +4MY WIFE would not speak to me this morning because I was out late last night,” complains the first man. “It makes me extremely unhapp} ry “It does ?" asks the second man.“ How long have you been married 2” “Two months.” . Here the second man turns on his heel and walks away. | JUDGE'S FAVORITES. LOTTA PAUST IN “THE WIZARD OF 02." Any play in which you sing On the wing Is the play that is the thing. Yet we feel that we may say, Any day. You're the thing that is the play. Ever the lines in which you beam, All a-gleam, Only make us fondly dream Of those lines that sweeter are— Yes, by far— ‘Your outlines, bewitching star. A PROVIDENT FOUR-YEAR-OLD. +4] SAID my prayers five times last night, daddy.” “ Why, Dorothy 2” “Oh, now, you know, I'll not have to say ‘em all those other nights.” SEEING NEW YORK." “There, Stella, look! That copper couldn't find a better sign to lean agin ef he wuz huntin’ all day.”" USELESS. Gitta” subscriptions fer a fence round the graveyard, ch? Ain't none o' the bodies tryin’ fer rit out, I hope?” Bo; but" “Wa-al, as long 's nobody 's tryin’ ter git out—an' I don't hear of anybody round these parts thet’s very mighty anxious ter git é—I ain't squanderin’ good money fer fancy dadoes round no Duryint rounds,” A & comicbooks.com