Judge, 1903-09-19 · page 5 of 16
Judge — September 19, 1903 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humorous pieces typical of early-20th-century American satirical magazines: **"An Advertising Courtesy"** jokes about a Sudanese sheik's tree grove—a pun revealing the trees are "date-trees" given by insurance companies as promotional gifts, mimicking how American insurers gave calendars. **"Where He Learned"** features a dentist explaining his ability to interpret baby gibberish through professional experience managing patients with rubber dams and fingers in their mouths—absurdist humor about occupational knowledge. **"The Pity"** presents a mother's delight that a visiting dentist understands her baby's nonsense speech, contrasting with his profession's exposure to muffled patient communication. **"Belles-Letters"** shows a dreamy young woman reciting romantic poetry. **"Feminine Timidity"** satirizes gender stereotypes through "Old Betsey Nabors," a physically strong rural Virginia woman who fearlessly traverses woods alone but admits embarrassment about bears—subverting expected notions of delicate femininity. **"A Figure of Speech"** depicts a painting negotiation where a client and artist miscommunicate about price. These represent Judge's characteristic light social satire and wordplay humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
--g@— HE explorer who is visiting the sheik in the Soudan is much impressed with his magnificent grove of trees. “You have a splendid collection of trees,” he says po- litely. “It must have taken much time and money to bring them together and plant them in such an orderly manner,” “Really,” says the sheik,“ they cost me nothing.” “ You don’t say ?” “It’s a fact. You see, our insurance companies remember their patrons with a tree the first of cach year.” “How odd! At home our insurance companies give us cal- endars.” “Which amounts to the same thing. These are date-trees.” WHERE HE LEARNED. HE Pre: Girt. (with infant)—"* De baby wuz born wid a vell."* HE chance caller delights the Bor— Hully gee! W'ot a pity dey ever tock it off!" parents of the new baby. When the infant says * Ooh, wah, oof, gooble, oohaw he knows ex- “Why, Mr. Pullem !” exclaims the delighted mother, I under- actly what it says. When it asserts “ Wooshy, boogaw, ooffe, oofer,” stand you have no children of your own. How in the world did you he immediately translates the speech. become so familiar with the prattle of little ones ?” “You forget that | am a Tyas]. dentist,” he explains. “| have “| to know what a patient is try- ing to say when he has a rub- ber dam and four or five of my fingers blocking his speech.” her dreamy ii, ill at ee, “The goo-goo glance I do not uu— I pray you, sir, to cc.” FEMININE TIMIDITY. OED Betsey Nabors was one of the rudely picturesque characters of a large rural dis- trict in the mountains of Vir- ginia, She was a great, mus- cular woman, her masculine appearance being emphasized by heavy boots and an immense bundle, since the gentle nomad carried her home on her back. “TL should think, Betse; said one of the farm-wives, that you'd be scared to death out in the woods all night.” “No, I ain't: skeered o° nuthin'—exceptin’ sometimes,” she added with a shamefaced air, “I do be a bit shy of a bar.” ‘AND you say Kinder is tender-hearted 2” “Indeed, yes. He sand- papered his bald spot last week, so that the mosquitoes fen. madam, can't paint you.” My price ts one thousand, and I couldn't consider your figure.” Would not slip upon it and Mrs. Woopsy-Sirrer—" Sir!" break their legs.’ A FIGURE OF SPEECH. “1 can't pay more than six hundred."* comicbooks.com.