Judge, 1903-05-02 · page 6 of 16
Judge — May 2, 1903 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three separate satirical pieces mocking social pretensions of the early 1900s. **"The Hotel Scare"** ridicules a perpetually failed politician who repeatedly loses elections but remains absurdly optimistic. He's now founded a bizarre "national health-food party" as yet another doomed political venture, treating it with unwarranted seriousness despite his consistent record of humiliating defeats. **"Its Finish"** jokes about wealthy men marrying women who will squander their collections—satirizing both gold-diggers and the materialism of the wealthy. **"Her Creed"** mocks a woman making scandalous public remarks. When challenged about belief in an afterlife, she claims to believe in the future but explicitly rejects the past—a witty jab at her own indecorous behavior and hypocrisy about moral judgment. The bedroom scene illustrations suggest the "scare" involves discovering a serpent in the hotel room, amplifying the absurdity through visual humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A HOTEL SCARE. ‘THE LATEST. E MEET the dis- gruntled poli- tician on the street. To our intense sur- prise, he wears a hap- py smile. Knowing as we do that he has been defeated on each of the party tickets at different times, and has also gone down ignominiously in the last campaign, when he headed an inde- pendent movement, we are somewhat sur- prised at his evident cheerfulness. “ Hello!" he cries. «I'm too busy to talk long. On my way to my headquarters.” * Headquarters ?” we echo. “Yep. Didn't you know I was on the ticket again this year?” : Hadn't heard of “No one answers. This room must be jt, Which party ?" vacant. “ Brand new one?” « Brand new?" \ ITS FINISH. Peneore—" They say that chap Ethel is going to marry has all kinds of money. * Beatrice—" Well, she won't do a thing but break up his collection.” “Sure! Greatest movement out. Idea struck me all of a heap day hefore yesterday. Organized the national health-food party. Platform pro- vides that all health foods shall be issued at par with each other, Great! Simply grand! Bound to catch ‘em all. And I'm the nominee for president in 1904. Want a running mate. What kind of health food do you eat?” But we were dodging up the alley. HER CREED. ‘6 RUT, madam,” we say to the lady who is attracting attention and excit- ing invidious comment by the risqueness of her remarks and the un- conventionality of her actions, “do you not believe in a hereafter ?” “Sure I do!” she declares, winking knowingly. “ But I draw the line on these people who believe in a past.” 3. . 4. * Dean’ yo" be skoered, miss. I's killed lots ob snakes.” (Biff! diff!) “Forgive me, boss!"" comicbooks.com