Judge — April 4, 1903 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

uage. AT THE JUDGE BUILDING, 110 FIFTH AVENUE, NEW TORE, Terms to Subscribers. UNITED STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE. ts00 tas FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all foreign countries im the postal union, $6.00 a year. ‘Wastexx Orrice—$28-820 Marguette Building, Cricage. Evnorean SaLes-acents—/nternational news company, Bream's building, Chancery lane, EC, London, Brentand's, avenue de COpra, Paris; Saarbach's acws exchange, Mains, Germany. The contents of JUDGE are protected by friogemest of this copyright will CONTRIBUTORS must ieclose a stampe: pyright in both the United States and Great Britais. iT WAS recently observed by a Wall-street statistician that we are now living in the enjoyment of a prosperity panic. A panic of prosperity is certainly a paradoxical term and one rather dif- ficult to be understood by people who have not the vision of the said Wall-street student of facts and figures. Consequent- ly it may seem strange to the average beholders to see Uncle Sam up to his armpits and almost drowning in a sea of gold. It seems like the illustration of an up-to-date parable. Uncle ‘Sam has goods to deliver, but not the facilities to deliver them. He has orders for all sorts of things that he beats the world at manufacturing, but not the mills necessary to produce them. He is up to his neck in business and working overtime, and the tide of gold has risen so high that he can no longer use his shovel, and is therefore shouting for a life-preserver; but the latter is not forthcoming, nor is a mantle like that of Elijah with which to hit and separate the waves, and it begins to look as if Uncle Sam may have to put a marine prosperity policy on his life and thereafter do business on a raft. He has more business now than he can attend to, and more money than he can spend. And still the barrels of gold are rolling his way, and the riches that have wings are flying to him. He is piling up the gold for many reasons, not the least of which is to make it practically impossible for the country to be pawned again, as it was by the Democrats not many years ago. He is pretty long-headed and far-sighted, and full of the kind of wisdom that lands the possessor in the first place. He has been floating so long that no one need be at all uneasy on the score of his safety. He is storm-proof and a practical handler of hurricanes of all sorts, as well as one who knows how to make the most of a calm. If some of the crowned heads would come over here for a while they would be well repaid for the journey, as it would enable them to take a few lessons in the art of keeping afloat from an acknowledged master. eee A GOOD FALSTAFF is a very rare article, and the man who is selected by a good judge to play this difficult réle must be a top-notcher as re- gards interpretation and the general all-round artistic skill that stands for achievement. Although we fancy that it will take more than a Falstaff— even a first-class specimen—to do the Democratic party any lasting good in the matter of reorganization and victory, yet do we think that Mr. Gor- man should consider it a feather in his politicat cap to have been cast for this part. The soldiers of his army are certainly as ragged as its music is rag-time, and when he attempts to gather them together for the conflict of 190, ne will become convinced of the melancholy fact that he has a con- tract on his hands that will require all his subtlest skill and art if he would fill it in a manner satisfactory to the rag-tag and bobtail contingent of which he is the accredited representative. Mr. Gorman can shuffle facts as a magician shuffles cards, or a juggler juggles knives. He can cause any card to flash up, and he never catches a knife by the blade as it descends. He is a high-priest of statecraft, and those things which he does not know concerning the game he plays so well are not set down in any book. It was for this rare talent and, in Mr. Gorman’s case, unique capability that he was selected for the rdle of Falstaff. If the selection had been made on the strength of rosy rotundity and elephantesqueness—the ruling features of the Falstaffian physique—the honor would certainly have fallen on the Princeton pachyderm with the twenty-eight-inch neck and the barrel-front effect. As it is, Mr. Cleveland, while not at the head of this rough-and- tumble rabble, is still holding with a firm grip the banner of free trade, which is the banner of a forlorn hope. Still, he is quite as picturesque as are Mr. Straus with his bulging barrel of money, from which he may soon be parted, and Mr. Bryan with his free-silver sword, that will not cut polit ical ice. Mr. Watterson also appears as a soldier of this tattered army, but he is only there as a historic landmark, and bears about the same rela: tion to Democracy that z wooden Indian does to the tobacco business, whose figure-head he is. Mr. Watterson is a unique Democrat in that he is neither a so-called Elijah nor a genuine Jonah. By the way, there is nota sufficient number of whales th existence to-day to swallow the Jenahs that are lying around loose on the troubled sea of Democracy. Tillman will be recognized in the ranks as a worthy soldier of this squad, as will the senile sphinx of Wolfert’s Roost. They are a pretty hard-looking lot of time-battered veterans, and Mr. Gorman will have the experience of his life in reorganizing them for action. We await the outcome with more than usual interest, and believe that the result will be such as to make it quite the kind of material which, in the right hands, might be developed into a comic opera that would easily eclipse the best specimens that have yet been produced in this or in any other country. A PROPHET. Deuce take your deuced impudence, you deuced caddie!"* Well, say! if yer can’t throw nuthin’ better dan det.ces { kin see yer finish.”* comicbooks.com