Judge — March 7, 1903 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AN ARTISTIC CRITICISM. s6 DRAW, scoundrel !"hisses d’Artagnan. Nervously the unknown enemy en- deavors to comply with the demand. He tangles his scabbard in his legs and almost falls over himself. “ Draw 2" shouts d’Artagnan with that reckless laugh of his. “Ma foi! You act as if you were a Sunday-supplement artist.” THE DIFFERENCE. se YOU'RE a first-rate sort of feller,” said the landlord of the Pruntytown tav- ern to the picture-enlarger, who had told him several new stories, “an’ I've got a notion to give you a pointer or two that may fit into your business. F'rinstance, it you visit the farms around here, where the folks call their places * Fairview Lodge’ an’ n Eden’ an’ Hazel Nook‘ an’ + Shady Cot,’ an’ such as that, you'll have a heap less trouble in takin’ orders than you will in gittin’ your pay afterward; but if you call on John H. Fullenwider, who sorter TOO BAD. sarcastically calls his farm + Hardscrabble- Jounson—"* How did he go broke?" on-the-Hump,’ an’ incidentally, an’ mebbe Jacxson—"' Bent on pleasure.”* JUDGE'S FAVORITES consequently, owns about all the land that ETHEL BARRYMORE. ‘Whene'er we look upon those smiling features And see you gayly kick about and caper, We fancy that we know why all the people Pour out their gold and silver on you freely, Even as smiling nature scatters daisies Upon the wind-bedimpled breast of spring-time. And we will bet our dollars to the doughnuts That mother used to make that you wil never Come homeward on the light and airy pedals That trip for us the merry tuneful measure That mocks the moonbeams trembling on the ocean. We also fancy that those rosy dimples Will put new life into the toothless granddads And make them feel like clgaretted dudelets. adjiins it, you'll probly not git an order—but if you should happen to your money is just as certainly sure as shootin’ fish in a barrel.” MEANS TO THE END. MACBETH had just murdered Duncan. I suppose you did it because you wanted to be king ?” asked his questioner. “No,” replied the thane; “I have a little volume of short stories 1 want to get published.” Hereupon he gave a few interviews to Shake- speare, to get his hand in practice. A REVISED VERSION. QS WHAT foundation stands the warrior’ pride Let the historic novelist decide. : He works the name at which the world grew pale ‘To point a moral and to sell his tale. REPARTEE. ‘Tue tortoise—* You make me nervous —you're always on the Jump.” Tue Haxe—" Well, you needn't worry. You'll never be arrested for exceeding the speed limit."* ‘oroin imal JUST LIKE AN ENGLISHMAN. dal | Me ft APOLEON had completed his fourth iN \I N year at St. Helena. ea “At least, sire,” observed a consoling courtier, “they are not holding you for your trunk.” + No," replied the little corporal ; «it's for my gri Perceiving his British attendants failed to laugh, he hereupon complained of the barbarity of the English nation. RASH GALUTTE. A FOOLISH young fellow in Butte Attempted to play on the flutte He tackled the scale, And his father turned pale And shattered the flutte on his snuth, ITS IDENTITY. Little Elmer— Pa, what is dyspepsia ?” Professor Broad- THEATRICAL TERM. head—" Egotism of the A curtain-raiser. indigestion, my son.” \ comicbooks.com