Judge, 1902-07-19 · page 7 of 16
Judge — July 19, 1902 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated humorous pieces typical of Judge magazine's satirical format: **Main Story**: "A True Story of the North Woods" mocks overconfident urban hunters. A "smart hunter" ignores a guide's warning about moose hunting being illegal (out of season), kills one anyway, and faces severe legal penalties—three hundred dollars initially, then ongoing fines. The moral: arrogance and refusing expert advice leads to financial ruin. The satire targets privileged city dwellers who ignore local expertise. **Side Jokes**: - "For His Lungs": Irish working-class humor about a drunk man claiming alcohol benefits his health - "In the Briny": A Hans character (ethnic humor type) complains about heat - "Reasonable": A woman prefers lenient divorce laws for "more weddings" - Brief poems and observations about urban versus rural life The page reflects early 20th-century American magazine humor: class-based satire, ethnic stereotyping, and cautionary tales about hubris.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A TRUE STORY OF THE NORTH WOODS. I [NE day a smart hunter set out to kill a moose which had been seen in a tract of the North Woods. On hi he met a guide. “Where are you going?” asked the guide. “To kill a moose,” replied the smart | unter, The ;uide opened wide his eyes and said a word not in the vocabulary of the righteous. “It is out of season for deer,” the guide reminded the hunter, “and a moose may not be killed. If you are looking for trouble go hunt one, The smart hunter told the guide to go to a warmer climate than may be found in the North Woods, and the guide replied that if the game-warden met him out for moose io the smart hunter would wish himself there. Thus they parted; the guide in search of mb and the smart hunter upon the trail of a moose. mountai IN THE BRINY. Hans Canp—" If dot git much varmer alredty yet 1 vas a cooked fis! REASONABLE. Why do you like to live where the divorce laws are so lenient?” Because there are so many more weddings there, dear."* FOR HIS LUNGS. Mr. Rooney (one a. m.)—" Let me in, Norah. Oi've only bin takin’ a few (hic) drinks fer th’ benefit av me lungs. Mrs. Rooney—"'Fer yer lungs, is ut? Well, shtay phere ye be an’ take th’ ‘ open-air tratement’ till marnin’, At last the moose was tracked to earth and slain and the smart hunter brought it home in tri- umph. There the game-warden greeted him with an icy frown and a marble heart and haled him be- fore the judge, who demanded three hundred dollars on the spot and more thereafter. For a year the smart hunter was seen constantly in the society of judges, juries, constables and mem- bers of the legal fraternity, giving frecly of his scanty substance on demand. One day he met the guide who had warned him from the path of trouble. “Ifyou had not been so smart,” said the guide, “you need not have paid five hundred dollars for the privilege of killing a moose. A man who is too smart to listen to the wise must pay high for his ex- perience,” M. wititnsow stounT. A THEORY. Landlady—" It is ridiculous the way those con- ductors shout ‘ Plenty of room inside’ when the car is crowded.” Boarder— Perhaps they think the majority of the passengers board.” OUT OF TOWN OVER SUNDAY. [ MIEAR strange sounds from wher T lay me down— ‘The surf beats on the shore 5 Thear the new arrival just from town As he begins to snore. Thear the seagulls whirring in the air; Their restless wings they be And then I hear distinct below the stair The huckster in the street. I hear the fe sound, ‘That warning to the sea. And then I hear that call-boy on his mourntul wg to call me. Soon to the city I shall tak To business soon shall be, To lie tw friends about my peaceful say ‘ On Sunday by the se TIME TO PRAY. Mountain -cuimser —"'I'm certainly ‘up ‘against it’ this time,” comicbooks.com