Judge, 1901-12-28 · page 21 of 49
Judge — December 28, 1901 — page 21: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several humorous Christmas-themed pieces typical of early 1900s American satirical humor: **"The Kittens' Tree"** is a whimsical poem-illustrated story about a cat planning to decorate a Christmas tree with candles and chocolate mice—a charming domestic fantasy. **"A Christmas Gift"** and **"Out of Hearing"** are brief racial and class-based jokes. The first contains a derogatory stereotype about Black people and chicken-stealing. The second mocks working-class parents giving noisy gifts (whistle and drum) to relatives who don't live nearby—crude but reflecting period class attitudes. **"Christmas Proverbs"** offers gentle satirical observations about holiday materialism and consumer culture. **"A Christmas Protest"** is a poem criticizing poorly-chosen gifts—cigars, smoking jackets, and oversized slippers—expressing frustration with gift-giving mismatches, likely targeted at women shoppers. The page reflects Judge's mix of genteel humor and period prejudices typical of early 1900s American satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
|. ** Now, a. ou keep two feet away from the counter and I'll do the same.” ‘THE KITTENS’ TREE. S6\JJHERE are you going, my lit- W tle kitty-cat, With your red ruffled gown and your cocked-up hat?” “+T'm off to the forest, kind sir," said she 5 “I'm going to chop down a Christ- mas tree.” *And what will you do with the tree?” I said. ‘The kitty-cat smiled and wagged her head. “Tl carry it home to my kittens three, Who will purr with delight at a Christ- mas-tree.”” “And what will you trim it with, kitty-cat, pray ?” “Ob, sir, I will trim it the very best way— I'll light it with candles so sparkling and nice, And on every branch I'll hang choco late mice.” canourn wazts. oe HAT did the colored people do to enter- tain the celebrated colored preacher when he made his Christmas visit 2” «Well, judging by results, they must have present- ed him the free- dom of all the chicken-coops in the neighbor- hood.” OUT OF HEAR- ING. Mrs. Cobwig- ger— wonder why Freddie's un- cle gave him a whistle and adrum for Christmas ?” Cobwigger— “I guess it was because he doesn’t live in the neigh- borhood.” A QUESTION TO DECIDE. Juupina Jack—"' | guess there will be some scrapping in the morning to see whom I belong to.” COPYRIGHT 1801 BY JUDGE COMPANY OF NEW YORK. CHRISTMAS PROVERBS. ‘HE watched Santa Claus never comes, The kissed girl does not fear the mistletoe. A bird on the table is worth a dozen in cold stor- age. Two heads are better- than one, especially in the youngster’s drum, The girl who hesi- tates under the mistle- _\ ° toe gets what she / went there after. It is never too late to mend, but at Christmas the small boy pre- fers a new article. While it may be better to. be born lucky than rich, with Santa Claus money always talks, Je}. o'connent, HE STOPPED THERE.’ +6 CAN you count, Bobby ?” “Yep. Chris'mus one, Chris'mus two,Chris'mus tree.” All right.”” REALISM. Lime Boreer—"' Oh, dear! If the horrid things would only lose themsely :s, as in the story-books.”” A CHRISTMAS PROTEST. SA¥: sitlst when Christmas comes along What is it makes you choose The gifts that are not worth a song, ‘And which no man can use? It's true I like to smoke, Marie, Yet nothing quite so shocks As those cigars you buy for me At ninety cents a box. A smoking-jacket suits me well— It's quite a handy thing ; But why select a pattern, Belle, ‘They wear up in Sing Sing? Though slippers put me at my ease, And should be fairly large, My foot, take notice, Florence, please, Is not an oyster-barge. Je}. O'CONNELL, 3. Lona (resting his head against the ceiling}—" Oh, you ain't so many.” Sackeith WitheinsLitho & Fig Co Rew York comicbooks.com