Judge — October 19, 1901 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK AT THE JUDGE BUILDING. Terms to Subscribers. UNITED STATRS AMO CANADA I ADVANCA. One copy, one year. or s2 numbers» $5.00 ‘One copy, six months. or 20 numbers - 2.50 One copy. for thirteen weeks © += 1.35 facluding the Cueistmas Ivoct FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS — To all foreign countries in the postal union, $6.00 a year. Wasrann Ornice—Henry Bright, manager, Boyce building, Chisago Eutorsay saiss-scents—/nter) lal urws company, Bream's building, Chancery lane, KC, London; Brentano's, avenue del Opéra, Paris Germany, CORNER FIFTH AVENUE AND SIXTEENTH STREET, NEW YORK. “Saar bach's mews exchange. Marne 9 Circulation larger thai say other cartoon weekly Ia the world. f~ NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS. —Th both the United States and Great Britain. I _ Mgorously prosecuted. CONTRIBUTORS must taclose a stamped and self-addressed envelope with all manuscripts, otherwise return of the latter when found waavallable caanot be guar anteed. DRAWINGS aad all other contributions seat to the Art Department should have the sender's full name and address written plainly oa each and every separate sketch. The accompany lag joke or descriptive letter-press should ia every tastance be written upon its ladividual picture, aad NOT upon a separate slip of paper. la- closure of stamps to the full amouat of postage Is alsa required, to lasure sale and prompt retura of material aot accepted. ontents of voce are protected by copyrigh right will be prompt HILE THE MOSQUITO is preening his wings for purposes of flit- ting apace, it may not be out of place, as a contribution to science, to say that a certain town in New Jersey boasts of a double-jointed speci- men, with a supplementary set of muscles, that poises upon the apex of a bottle and gets into a position similar to that of an acrobat when bending the crab, and with his bill, which is spiral, pulls the hardest cork in the smallest fraction of a jiffy. CONSOLATION cuPp— That is, a booby- prize— Some boardof stewards should put up. And make it great in size And rich in fang and claw— . A muracle of grace— And_for the same let Mr. Law- Son and Dunraven race, eee Me: LAURENCE HUTTON enjoys the unique distinction of being the only man that ever possessed a death-mask that grows whiskers. If Mr. Hut- ton could only turn his attention from litera- ture and the drama for awhile he might make a colossal fortune by constructing seals and sheep of a composition similar to that which was used in the mould- ing of the said Lord Palmerston whisker- growing death-mask. Possibly he hasn't the formula; but if he has he could soon corner the. sealskin - sacque and all-wool under- clothing markets, and be forever after known as a public benefac- tor. of the very first dun answered befo’ de sun rise in de mo'nin; water. Brotuer Coor—" Dat’s so, dekin. GOD HELPS THEM THAT HEL CON Pipr—"* Fo'a fac’, pahson, de Lawd do answer pra'r: but de niggah mus’ know how to pray. Ef dis niggah pray de Lawd fo" to sen’ him one ob Missus Bascum’s chickens. de Lawd he shuah fo'get to answer dat pra'r; but ef de righteous culled man pray de Lawd to sen’ him /o gif dat fowl, dat pra am I's bin blessed wif dispensations ob Providence ob dat natur’.” FOOTBALL FOOTNOTES. ‘ VIEW of the fact that football renders such financial balm to the various seats of learning which encourage this sport that it simply be- comes, so to speak, a golden poultice, it should not be unfair to suggest that these institutions set apart a certain portion of the gate-receipts, to be invested, like an endowment fund, for a football pension-list. The greatest permanent injury should entitle the player receiving it to live in the glory and enjoyment of the same without let or hindrance. Then would the knight of the pigskin be stimulated, not to break others that he might be broken himself, not necessarily as a guarantee of good faith, but as a means to the end, which is the end of every man’s desire. A pension would, in a certain sense, be looked upon as a scholarship, and a man who could enter college with one and leave it with the other would certainly be of such calibre mentally and physically as to be easily recognizable as the kind of double-barreled success that the wide-awake, up-to-date business man is on the lookout for. With every player protecting every other player with wiom he comes in contact, that he may be dislocated and maimed himself, would of course make the game a much safer one to in- dulge in, though a tamer one to look at. And then, with every player looking out for the welfare and safety of every other player—though selfish the motive—the result would be that no injuries would occur, and the seat of learning, prepared to grant pensions, would be enabled to keep the capital in its treasury. Then would the game rise in the public estima- tion, and continue to rise until the football player would become renowned for his gentleness and be more kicked against than kicking. The song of the football is heard in the land, and the foliage is grace- fully turning, that it may represent in color the various colleges that shin, shank, scamper and scoot on the gridiron. The man with an ordinarily keen sporting nose may now scent’ the battle from anear, and if he has a cold in his cranial dome he may still know that the football is now pirouetting around by simply gazing into each and every shop-window, for there 1s no line of business that does not appear to boom itself with football decorations, though no one can tell just why. The shop-window is, so to speak, the barometer of the game. It glories in illustrating football in some phase or oth- er, as if under contract todo so. How a dum- my player in full armor in a window can boom the business of a mu- sicestore is quite be- yond the average intel- lect to explain, And how a number of foot- balls lying around in an undertakers w dow can push the pro- prietor’s interests along is not quite clear to the layman. Yet they seem to be as much in place in these windows as in those of sporting= goods bazaars,in which they rightly and prop- erly belong, quite as much as they do in the oriels of the artificial- limb dealer or of the surgeon that is ready to set your nose or your collar-bone while you wait. But football has come to stay for a few weeks, and nothing ap- pertaining to it should come within the pale of criticism, whether in connection with busi- nessorpleasure. There- fore let it bound bound- lessly along, while the pensive porker grace- fully gives up his skin to form the envelope of the flitting sphere. comicbooks.com