Judge, 1901-10-05 · page 5 of 16
Judge — October 5, 1901 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humorous pieces typical of Judge's satirical style: **"The Athletic Worm"** is a fable mocking outdated conventional wisdom. A bird hunts a worm, but the worm—described as a "garter variety"—escapes by catching its tail in its mouth and rolling away like a hoop, suggesting old advice ("the old adages are untrue") doesn't always apply. **The fashion/social humor** includes a seaside scene poking fun at pretentious dressing and a courtship exchange where a woman manipulates her fiancé's financial dependence, satirizing matrimonial negotiations. **"At a Reception"** contains political satire: a Tammany Hall operative (a notoriously corrupt New York political machine) repeatedly attends receptions for free meals. The joke is dark—the character likely thinks eating at public events equals voting, mocking both the corruption of machine politics and the intelligence of its participants. The remaining pieces are light seasonal and domestic humor about autumn, rag-time music, and everyday activities—characteristic filler content of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A STELLAK STEP. THE ATHLETIC WORM. (A fable.) AN EARLY WORM that was taking a stroll one morn- ing at sunrise observed a bird perched on a bough. The bird 4; was moving its ‘The swell at the shore thought to neck from side make a splurge By the sad sea.waves in his suit of ' Side, as serge. though looking for something. Then it saw the little worm, and recollected that its doctor pre- scribed a fresh one every morn- ing before breakfast. It made a pounce for its prey, but the worm, which was of the garter iety, caught its tail in’ its mouth, and, laughing heart- rolled off backward in the manner of a hoop. Moral: Many of the old are untru nowadays. worms know a thing of two. AUTUMN- | ; 3. ESQUE, | For His (oes surged up and his hat HE apples Refore his “d'p * he e’en could are hanging dof. and banging, all red and yellow and mellow, and in his web the spider is now a sad abider, which means he thinks it high time that it again were fly- time. The gold- en-rod_ is blaz- ing, in beauty 4 : And the only mash he made “at TUNE amazin | that” the hollyhos LOOKING FORWARD. Was the mash he made when he Miss Gotrox—"' I feel sure you could not support me without assistance.” mashed his hat. the poet ‘s fond- CHour Well, I hope your father will keep on feeling that way after we are married.” ly praising. And so dear old October. with shining, twining tresses, the forest's blithe disrober, her fancies thus expresses: Oh, the chestnut is the best nut that upon the ground we see. Soon the squirrel through the burr ll send his grinders fancy free. Oh, the wood-pile is a good pile in the farmer's bank of joy, and the cider paints a wider grin upon the happy boy. A RAG-TIME CAMEO. THE squirrel ’s gayly skipping The housewife "s pirouetting, And while the rabbit nag-time Akimbo on the rai At rapture’s goal awake, Is making full of song, The gunner ’s fairly ripping While tuning up and setting The cider-mill in rag-time The feathers off the quail. The griddle for the cake. Is gurgling right along. 5 AT A RECEPTION. And ig aay of serge seemed a suit Bobley—" That Tammany heeler has just come down here to eat for the seventh time. What do you suppose of crash, ' And the only “splurge” be made hve thinks canacaylcne was a splash, : Cobley—" He probably thinks he is voting.’ comicbooks.com