Judge — July 20, 1901 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

NO TROUBLE. 0’ DON'T know of no colored church needin’ a_preach- ah, do yo'?” asked a colored brother of the Missouri Baptist evangel- ist. “I got no place to preach jus’ now.” “Why, I al- ways thought you were pastor of this church here,” the evangelist replied. “T was, but I's quit “Well, I hope you did not give them a lot of trouble, like their last pastor. He nearly ruined their church before they got rid of him.” “No, sah; didn't give ‘em no trouble—dar warn’t no trouble er- bout it. De deacons jus’ got toged- BADLY MIXED. der an’ handed in mah resugnation, Mr. Ht Bawi—* Schuse me, ole man ; got it (hic) mixed up wis gof.” an’ I accepted it.” PROGNOSTICATION BY PARAPLUIE. THE only happy lover is he who “THE meteorological man may be all right—sometimes—but it takes an umbrella'to denote the changes and makes no inquiries, chances of this mortal life. When you sce a man holding an umbrella over a lady and cataracts pour over that fellow's hat, that is court- ship. When the man lets the rain drip down the lady's: neck, taking good care bis own cha- peau will not be wet, that is mar- riage. When one is placed in the rack at the club it invariably denotes that there is going to be acchange in the ownership; and when that gingham is carried in the precise position which is cal- culated to remove any one’s and every one's eyes, it signifies be- yond all doubt, “I am a wo- man!" LA TOUCHE HANCOCK. LINES TO A COMB. By a Dald-headed Man, HATE'ER may in this world betide, ‘Though distant lands I wander through, Though seas from me all else A MOSQUITO TRAP. divide, Mosqurro—"‘Ah ! here's the kind of a neck I like.— T'll never, never part with you! UNPAID. SHAMEFUL. First ROBBER (tho Aas sust held up Dubber, the artist)—"* Did you get any Mr. Cicar—" Excuse me, Miss Cigar, but you are losing bills?” your wrapper,” Second RoppeR—'* Nothin’ but!" comicbooks.com