Judge, 1901-03-30 · page 4 of 16
Judge — March 30, 1901 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humor pieces and illustrations typical of early 20th-century Judge magazine: **"The Alchemy of Spring"** - A poetic observation about spring's transformative effects, citing the butter-cup flower. **"Exhausted Surplus"** and **"Usual Reply"** - Domestic humor about a woman's shopping expenses and a bookstore clerk's stock response about unavailable items. **"Robbing Himself"** and **"His Reply"** - A brief exchange about someone's past behavior. **"The Snow Man"** - An illustration showing a figure with poor people, captioned with dark humor about striking a "poor man pretty hard." **"Not a Lover of Bread"** - A final scene depicting two figures discussing bread, likely satirizing working-class concerns or domestic disputes. The page represents typical Judge content: domestic satire, social observation, and class-based humor common to the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE'S FAVORITES, MARY KEALTY. Not all our ** Favorites” can appear, For they are numerous as dear— Jn fact, for every one that we Publish, we leave out thirty-three. Rc “is your tun for praise today: “When Woman Loves,” ail comes her way. REFLECTIONS OF A SPINSTER. A PERFUMED man is as shocking as a woman in a wig. The things he does not possess hold an infinite charm for a man, A spare man is always called lank by the women who dislike him, The wife of a dishonest man is one of life's unac- knowledged heroines. It is possible for a man to divorce a Josephine and not become a Napoleon. It is a thankless lot to love a man who is inseparably united with his business. There is greater obsti- nacy among weak men than there is among the strong. First 1080 (looking at SECOND 10K0—"* Sure x * W'ot did yer do dat fer?" SECOND MoO —"" I promised de t'rifty lady I got it frum dat I'd husband it carefully an’ make it go as far as possible." First nono THE ALCHEMY OF SPRING, "ER where the cow-slip lies inurned ‘The milk-weed shooteth up, And when the winds of March have churned, Behold —the butter-cup! EXHAUSTED THE SUR- PLUS. Mrs. Crabshaw —" When did you decide you wouldn't have a new suit this spring ? Crabshaw —* When 1 saw the bill for your bonnet.” USUAL REPLY. “THE new clerk in the book- store had formerly officiated in a pharmacy, and therefore it came natural to him to reply, when a customer asked him for Bancroft's History: “Sorry, but we are just out of it now. However, we have some of our own make that is really much better.” me out last night. mind,” ROBBING HIMSELF. Recoy—" Bessie, it was awfully rude of your papa to ki I'm just going to give him a piece of my ly ™ We Iessie—"* Goodness gracious, don't! You can’t spare it.” Gus-Dias-ta, THE SNOW MAN. Moose — "* My goodness! T must have hit that poor man pretty hard. He hasn't moved once since I struck him.” NOT A LOVER OF BREAD. PERILS OF THE DEEP. Greets —* Peckhenhammer has arrived safe, I just received a cablegram from him.” Mects—" Did he have a rough voyage?” Greets —" No; his wife didn’t go.” HIS REPLY. Askington —"\ believe you have a new girl-baby at your house, Pillsbury ?” Druggist (absent-mind- ed, from force of habit)— “Well, no; not exactly—but I have something just as good.” BRIGHT PROSPECT. The new parrot—* What kind of a person is our an- tique owner, anyway ?” The other parrot—" Oh, she's one of those real nice, charitable, humane ladies who'll feed you on bread- and-water for ‘a week every time you swear.” gassing Sreight train) ~* Great heavens! Did yer leave dat bull loaf uv bread in de car?” comicbooks.com