Judge, 1901-01-26 · page 3 of 16
Judge — January 26, 1901 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three unrelated humorous pieces typical of Judge magazine's satirical format: **Top cartoon ("Quite Understandable")**: Two men discuss identifying someone—one mentions a farmer from East Side who "told Miranda nobody would know me in this new hat and coat," suggesting the humor involves disguise or mistaken identity as a social commentary. **"Shy-lock Homes, Burglar"**: A parody detective story about a burglar named Shy-lock Holmes (punning on Sherlock Holmes). The narrator describes being recruited for a burglary, examining tracks, then being abandoned with stolen goods—satirizing both detective fiction conventions and criminal incompetence. **"Astonishing Ignorance"** and **"Fly Burglar"**: Brief comedic vignettes about matches, spiders, and burglary misadventures. The page primarily offers light entertainment rather than political satire, focusing on wordplay, fictional parody, and slapstick scenarios.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
QUITE UNDERSTANDABLE. Teuer (of New York bank)—** will have to be identified, sir.” Faster Scupper (of East Neck)—"* By hookey! I told Mirandy nobody would know me in this new bat and coat.” SHY-LOCK HOMES, BURGLAR. BY A, C——N D——LE. HY-LOCK HOMES was silent. He had just injected seventeen grains of cocaine. Presently he woke up. “ Watkins,” he said, * I have had a dream!" “What do you deduce asked. (I always ike this just to it was my cue.) “This!” cried the “ only one,” jumping up and making tracks in the dust for practice, “ This!" He examined the tracks he had just made. I looked at him in amazement. I couldn't help it. Presently he spoke. “Look !" he said. “* Burglary !” ‘The possibilities flashed across me. My heart beat. “ How do you know?” I asked. (Sometimes I varied the question, like this.) He pointed at the floor. couldn't see anything. But I was : ulated. That explained all. I followed, my heart still beating. I knew now we were going to burglarize on new principles. * Wait here!” I waited. On a door- step. He disappeared. Presently he came back, his arms full of * loot.” “ Wait!" he said. . I waited. A cop came by. People si os Renters Puctents Ht rushed out of the door. I was discov- “Thank you; I hope I shall now be able to cred. 1 called. No reply. Three © write better sermons.” months. Shy-lock Homes was gone! FLY BURGLAR—"' Heavens! What a fool I was to try and rob the Hostess—" I hope so.” xe ruts, spider family.” comicbooks.com