Judge, 1900-07-14 · page 10 of 20
Judge — July 14, 1900 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple short humorous vignettes typical of early 20th-century satirical magazines. **Key satirical pieces:** - **"Incomprehensible"**: Jokes about Brooklyn relocation and outdated parenting (baby carriages for old children) - **"The Bather"**: Social commentary on women's swimwear fashion—ladies complain about style constraints yet manage to smile anyway - **"Acquainted with the Species"**: Mrs. Youngmother boasts her child is sweetest; Mr. Olden deflates her with news of his seven identical children - **"Plans Gang Aglee"**: Widow Mrs. Jones promised to follow her dead husband but delays to attend the Paris Exposition—satirizing women's materialism over marital devotion - **"Better Than a Peace Congress"**: The Paris Exposition's success allegedly postpones European war—mocking international politics - **Miscellaneous jokes**: Include puns (Carnegie "prophets" vs. profits), observations on male vs. female mistakes, and marital sparring The humor relies on contemporary references (Paris Exposition), gender stereotypes, and wordplay typical of Judge's satirical voice.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
INCOMPREHENSIBLE. SOVJHY did Whiffett move to Brooklyn?” asked Hungerford. “I'm sure I don’t know,” replied Bellingham. “His children are all too old to be pushed in baby-carriages.” THE BATHER. ALTHOUGH the prides in great distress Rail at this season's style, They should be just; besides her dress She also wears a smile. ACQUAINTED WITH THE SPECIES. Mrs. Yungmuther— “Oh, Mr. Olden! I wish you could see my little girl. I be- lieve she is the sweetest child in the whole world.” Mr. Olden —" My dear woman, I have seven of my “Oh. Mr. Softleigh' Sister said you hadn't sand own, and they are all of that enough to kiss a china doll. Won't you please try it and let me see how much sand you use?” PLANS GANG AGLEE. Mrs. Brown Mrs. Jones always said if her husband died she would quickly follow him. He has been dead a month.” Mrs. SaitH—" Yes; but you can’t decently ex- pect her to follow him till she has seen the Paris expo- sition, can you? There is always something to disar- range a woman's plans, you know. A QUESTION OF TIME. ++ ALL things come round to those who wait.” If so, let lazy men rejoice ; But ‘twill be found, as sure as fate, Who go for them will have first choice. BETTER THAN A PEACE CONGRESS. First Parisian —" Ab, the exposition grand success Second Parisian—*Yes; | understand polit- A SHORT CUT. ical writers have postponed the general European Tue RoAcH—* Well, good-bye! I'm going by the underground tunnel.” war another year on its account.” VERY IMPRESSIVE. SOTHE profits of the Carnegie steel company are differ- ent from other sorts of prophets,” said Dinsmore. “In what way?” asked Kil- duff, “They are not without hon- or, in their own country or any- where else.” AN INSTANCE. THAT second thoughts are al- ways best Is true unto the letter, Because I loved a certain girl ‘The instant that I met her. HIS OPINION, Mrs, Mecker—" As a gen- eral thing, | believe a man is more likely than a woman to make a mistake.” Mr. Meeker (with a sudden burst of spirit)—" I think you're IT WASICRUEL, BUT== right, my dear. She—she is usu- HE—" Did you know that lobsters would eat crabs?” ally it. Swe—" Certainly. You told me only yesterday that you was very fond of crabs.” comicbooks.com