Judge, 1900-01-06 · page 7 of 16
Judge — January 6, 1900 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains several satirical pieces about Christmas and social behavior circa early 1900s: **"The Christmas Cigar"** (top): A mock advertisement promoting cigars as gifts for men. The satire: despite elaborate, expensive packaging with ribbons and decorative boxes, men only care about the cigar itself and will ignore the presentation entirely—critiquing both wasteful gift-wrapping and masculine indifference to aesthetic effort. **"An Innovation"**: Mrs. Dinsmore reads that a wealthy Ohio businessman wants to buy a congressional seat. The joke: she's shocked that offices are now being auctioned to the highest bidder, while her husband notes that at least *senate* seats have long been purchasable—satirizing political corruption as normalized practice. **Other brief humor pieces** include jokes about mistletoe-hanging, fish-story exaggeration, and a drunk man bragging about billiards before his wife arrives—typical period comedy about masculine behavior and domestic life. The overall tone criticizes consumerism, political venality, and male foolishness.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Suape THE CHRISTMAS CIGAR. HO'LL buy?, Oh, throng on gifts intent, Cast hitherward thy eyes. Dear womankind, we here pre- sent Thy Christmas-tide stirprise. Art zealous for a brother, friend, A husband? Cease thy fuss. Accept our services and send A box or so of us. Observe our wealth of silver-foil, Regardless of expense ; Observe, result of art and toil, Oar swell environments. The cover with a picture sweet— Was ever scene more fair? And see—an extra effort neat— ‘The ribbons that we wear. The legend o'er the contents here ‘No man will e’er forget: re “The season's compliments, cheer,” ** Sweet thoughts,” ‘* With love,” et cet.; And all—the box, the picture fine, The foil, the ribbons gay— Is going at one ninety-nine For this. blithe Christmas day. But like as not when you have tried To suit some mannish whim, And bring your gift, all ribbon-tied, ‘An offering unto him, In spite of bargain—frillsand frocks! How dearth of taste men are !— He'll disregard the pretty box And kick on the cigar. epwiw L santn. AN INNOVATION s LISTEN to this,” said Mrs. Dinsmore, looking up from the paper. “A mill ionaire in Ohio wants to go to congress, and he wants the office in his rs district knocked aay aisani litte down to the highest AN = bidder. Isn't that A dreadful?” “I should say that it was,” replied Mr. Dinsmore. “Heretofore it has oniy been seats in the senate that could be bought.” A WISE GIRL. Dolly—" How is it she has so many callers on New- year’s day?” Poraven Stanlaws, Madge— Be- RETALIATION. cause she still has Mrs. JustWrn—‘'I gave that tramp a couple of the biscuits I her Christmas mis- cooked this morning.” ni z Mr. Justwep— Then we must turn loose the dog to-night. The tletoe hanging up.” fellow will surely come back and try to burn the barn.” WORD FROM THE WANDERER. ACCOUNTING FOR IT. “Dear Tom—Here it is three weeks after Christmas, and as {write this I sit with my window open, ‘Think of do: Walton—"| assure you, sir, that some of the best fish-stories are never told.” ing that back in old New England !” Calton— Yes; | suppose fishermen are occasionally drowned.” ii t \ JUST BEFORE HIS WIFE CAME IN. i Boozur—" I'll bet yer (bic) drinksh (hic) can make red ball in (hic) comer pocket.” comicbooks.com