Judge — January 6, 1900 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Huncry Han: m'self. It's terrible AND YET SO FAR. (the Aumorist)—"* Talk about yer hard luck! Dat's what I calls de limit—ter see a square meal what's just out uv reach, I bin dere UNNECESSARY QUESTION. +sDOINDEXTER married an act- ress, didn't he?" asked Bainbridge. i “Yes,” replied Gil dersiceve. “He was her manager. “ Does he manage her now?” Didn't I say that he was married to her?” NOTHING TO DAMN. Jaggles—" Webheara great many people damn- ing the trusts, but it does not seem to do any good." Wag gles —* How could it? A corporation has no soul.” A MATTER OF NECESSITY. Willie —* Why does a man swear off so many things at New-year's ?” Crabshaw—* He has to, my boy, for he” “3% spent all his money at Christmas.” THE FIRST JOKE—A. M,, 1. TH digprimal year was davening o'er the garden first parents caused the race to grieve), A aming on his clinging partner, heartily, ** Happy new year, Eve" The day came on in splendor over Eden, With glory all the peaceful place adorning ; And Eve, the arch one, said, “Adam, you're off ! “Tain't New-year eve; it's New-year morning.” First FRoc—* I hear the snail is a splendid chess-player.”” Seconp FRoG—"* Yes; he can move slower than any one I ever saw.” A HUNGARIAN BREAK-DOWN. UNRELIABLE. ¢¢TTHAT China will ul- timately become the property of Russia,” said the Muscovite statesman, “is manifest destiny.” “Certainly,” replied another Muscovite states- man. “Still, England claims that it is manifest destiny that China will some day belong to her.” “Humph! How double faced destiny is getting to be!” A HEALTHY BE- LIEF. Miss Eddylove—" Do you believe in Christian | science, Mr. Power?” Will Power—"Yes; except when I'm sick.” THE BRAIN-WORK. + SHE claim that there is no brain-work about golf makes me tired,” said Mr. Putter. “Well, is there?” asked Mr. Perkins, “Is there? Well, you never tried to learn the language, or you wouldn't ask that.” NEW-YEAR'S AUTOGRAPHS. OF ALL the collectors of autographs I've found the one that cheeriest laughs, Whose satisfaction the longest endures, Is he that secures the signatures Of his creditors to receipts attached, For such a collection cannot be matched ; And on New-year's day, as many find, Is the time to start one of this kind. om comicbooks.com