Judge — December 2, 1899 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUST A FAD, ry IMP'S funeral took place to- day,” remarked Barlow to his wife. “Dear me! is Mr. Gimp dead?” said Mrs. Barlow, 0." replied Mr. Barlow, sav- agely; “tit is merely a fad of Gimp's to be buried alive.” UNDERSTANDS HIS BUSINESS, AX UNDERTAKER, blow for blow, In fight would badly pan out: But when it comes to boxing, though, He'll neatly lay his man out. TOO EXTENSIVE A BUSINESS. First British official— \ tell you we had a great scare this morning.” Second British official—"Ab,what was the trouble—get a report that Aus- i tin was writing a poem on the Trans- vaal affair?” Feneieriennusie First British official" No. We WELL PRESERVED \ came pretty near sending Ru: by Haro.p—" How well Mrs. Fourinhand keeps her age !" mistake, an installment of ultimatums Epitit—" Yes, She doesn't look a day younger than she did ten years ago.” intended for Africa.” STAN laws “Roumania Where Carmen Sylva reigns and sings, ‘Where eagles take their fight From the world’s demesne to air serene ‘On some cloud-capped Carpathian herght— Toul with songs the west wind there, A REBUKE oy zineara wid ree Tue, anv (to the anteeater}—" Don't you know it's very rude to put your tongue out that way?” ” Were easier than taming ees” ere casier than taming thee. A LITTLE DATA. oe [s YOUR fiancé blue-blood- ed?" said one Boston maiden to another. “Well, he lives on Milk street,” was the more or less satisfactory reply. FOOT-BALL WISDOM. Wt N falling keep on top of all; When tackled try to duck it. Re careful when you kick the ball You do not kick the bucket. THE CASE REVERSED. First turkey—*Lwish Uhad lived in the days of Jonah and the whale.” Second turkey—" Why?” First turkey —* Ah, there was the time a man was used for stuffing.”” “Whoa! whoa. dar! Goodness, whad a chile! I ain't neber gwine ter wash dat lil’ coon no mo’, ‘caise whad's de use r stuffing. ‘ob washin’ ‘im when he so brack cain’t no one tell ef he clean or not?” comicbooks.com