Judge, 1899-08-05 · page 5 of 16
Judge — August 5, 1899 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* contains several brief satirical pieces typical of turn-of-the-century American humor: **"How She Has Advanced"** contrasts Sir Walter Raleigh's gallant gesture (throwing his cloak for Queen Elizabeth) with modern women who now dominate men without reciprocal courtesy—satirizing women's changing social position. **"Proof Positive"** and related brief jokes mock poor logic and everyday absurdities (mosquitoes and kerosene; timepieces and fireflies). **"Spain's Lost Opportunity"** references Spain's military losses, likely alluding to the Spanish-American War (1898) and Spain's subsequent loss of colonies. The Transvaal reference suggests contemporary tensions in the Boer War (1899-1902). **"Judges World's Fair: Araby's Daughter"** presents romantic poetry about an Arab woman longing for Western civilization—reflecting period orientalist attitudes. **"Very Definite"** is a doctor joke playing on medical terminology, with doctors evasively naming diseases after what they *aren't* rather than what they are—satirizing medical uncertainty or obfuscation. The page reflects early 1900s preoccupations: gender role changes, imperial politics, and technological/medical confidence.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
HOW SHE HAS ADVANCED. GIR. WALTER RALEIGH threw his cloak At good Queen Hess's feet, And ever since we've praised the act And thought it very neat. Itut chivalry is not gone yet; We simply make less fuss. + Fair woman with impunity Now walks all over us SC LANDRORGH WILSON, PROOF POSITIVE. ts] THINK they have at last emptied some keroscne-oil on the pond to Kill the mosquitoes,” said a New Jersey hostess to a guest, when the latter's little UNGRATEFUL ** Devil take such a time-piece, any way ! E day I've wound it up regularly ; to-day T aci ally forget it, and—the blamed thing stops goin; boy chimed in: “There must be oil on it, mamma: for just see, the fire-Mies are out there fill- ing their lamps."* iH SDITY. My great-grandfather was a lawyer.” T suspected it de minute T scen you swipe everyt'ing on dat clothesline.” Sexxy Sour. Weary Wes SPAIN’S LOST OPPOR- TUNITY. g fortunate in war, ‘That fact alone is what has made her great.” “Yes, that is true,” replied the high-born hidalgo. “She is peculiarly lucky in the matter of enemies. Now the Transvaal is one of the smallest nations in the world.” WHY HE DOESN'T, SEYJHY doesn't he mind his He isn’t so inclined, Mecause he has no business And because he has no mind, ish—* The man I shall marry will never brag to me about his mother’s cooking.” Miss Frocks —" How will you prevent it? v ARABIA JUDGE'S WORLD'S FAIR No. x ARANY'S DAUGHTER. She sighs for her love, as the hart pants for water, ‘palm of the desert, she dreams of the pine A bride of the sultan is Araby's daughter, Vet wistlully westward her dove-eyes incline, A falcon swooped down {rom the sunset and caught her, He held her a moment, then ‘on his flight; Rut deep in the bosom of Araby's daughter Is buried the death of a dream of delight. HIS habit of civilization is the hardest of all habits to break. DEFINITE. Miss Kittish—" Voor Jack say, doctor, just what és this ‘grip,’ any way?” lost his mother when he was only Why, my good fellow, that’s the name we doctors have for everything nowadays but appendicitis.” h three years old.” {" And what is appendicitis?” Docrox—'* Why, that’s the name we have for everything but the * grip.’ comicbooks.com