Judge — December 3, 1898 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HIS IDEA OF TIME. “Don't wish fer the time to fly so fast,” says dad,“ Why, it ain't a day Sence your mother ‘an’ me waz sweethearts, under the blossoms of May; Sence we stood out thar by the garden-gate, happy as hearts could be, An’ I fooled her—jest like we fool em all—into ilow womankind must envy Eve when cruel husbands frown If asked for cash to dress them prettily ; For when her woman nature craved a new and stylish gown She only had to pluck one from a tree. —Denver Post, “What strange questions children some- times ask!" exclaimed the gentle-faced man. “ Humph !” exclaimed the neighbor. “* Your trouble hasn't fairly begun, Wait till they ‘come home and ask you what the weight of the whole fish is if x, y and z equal a lot of things that you've forgotten years ago.”— Washing- ton Star, ‘Sybit—" I's no use denying it, Maud. It was too dark for me to see who it was, but | distinctly saw some young man kiss you in the garden. I'm ashamed of you." Afaud—*1 don't see why you should be. I've often seen George kiss you.” Sybif (engaged to George)— “Yes; but I allow nobody but George to kiss me.” Maud—* Well, it was nobody but George Champagne is a restorative if pure. Cools Imperial Champagne, extra dry, has a century record for purity. When a woman has a dress made she is kept running to the dressmaker’s so often that she gets time to do little else. If a woman got as many as one new dress in six months she would be unable to hold her job down town.—Ascht- ‘on Globe. If you don’t eat or sleep well, have headaches and dizzy spells, try the genuine im- ported Dr. Siegert’s Angostura Bitters. ‘There are poems unwritten and songs unsung, But don’t let this fact get your nerves all un- strung. "Tis economy wond'rous for midnight lamps, And think what an awfal big saving of stamps. —Detroit Free Press, Dr. Ball's Cough Syrup conquers croup at once, cures the child, and thus saves many a life. Mothers need not fear that dreadful disease if the have this reliable remedy at hand. It is sold by all druggists for 25 cents. “Do you know that a raw onion thing in the world to clear your head?’ ._T've tried it, and it even cleared the Cincinnati Enquirer, PURE, REFRESHING, ANTISEPTIC. | For all-round hygienic excellence no cleansing agent compares with Packer’s "Tar Soap. Bitters that benefit mind and body: Ab- bott'’s— The Original Angostura — build up wasted tissue, brighten up the mental faculties, and make new men and women, Really, it pays for me to be extravagant,” said a woman, “After a fit of economy, you know, I always have a reactionary recklessness for expense that more than makes up for the economy. Bot after a fit of extravagance I have a reactionary fit of economy. If I would be economical, therefore, I must first be ex- travagant."—WNew York Evening Sun. A special dispatch from Webster city, Iowa, says that a watch was recently found in the stomach of a cow at that place. The time-piece had been swallowed seven years before, and the action of the lungs in breathing had kept the stem winder wound constantly, so that the watch was still running and had lost but four minutes. We have later information that it wasn't a cow at all, but a watch-dog.—Chicago Times-Herald, THE CELEBRATED SOHMER HEADS THE LIST or THE HIGHEST GRADE PIANOS. It is the favorite of the artists and the refined musical public. _SOHMER & CO., Piano Manufacturers New York Warerooms, SOHMER BUILDING | FIFTH AVENUE, COR. 220 STREET. | A Natural Black is Produced by Buckingham’s Dye cet g Whiskers, 50 cts, of druggists or R.P.Hall & Co,,Nashua,N.H. 0.8. Sloane Ire now showing a great variely of choice Foreign and American WILTON CAR- PETINGS, in designs and colorings pre- fared under their direction, to sutt the high-class decorations and furnishings of the several important periods. Their well-selected and varied stock of ORIENTAL RUGS ts replete with rare and beautiful specimens of the Eastern hand-looms, Interior Decorations; Imported Wall Papers ; Special Design Furniture of best French and American manufacture, Broadway & 19th St. A DELIGHTFUL ANTISEPTIC Mo! New- Yorker—" You are a stranger here, 1 presume?” Chicago man (hanghtily am from the great city that New York is jealous of." New-Yorker—*Ah! and how are things in dear old Lunnon?’—New York Weekly. Tor Pa. NO More Lost Coats. Tho latest novelty, Name in Ce eu, coat, Coat-hanger. Everybody w Sete, Joba B. Collins, New Eagle, Washtogtoa The | rudentia LIFE INSURANCE, $15 to $50,000 AGES....BOTH SEXES Write for tnformation THE PRUDENTIAL INSURANCE CO. + OP AMERICA... y That age, with the wrinkles an’ ‘Thar wuz birds in the mornin’ keepin’ the house fer me. who kissed me."— 7id- Bits, “Don't wish fer the time to fly so fast,” says dad. ‘It wur yesterday When a song is sung so much that everybody dislikes it it is called popular.—foxbury Ga- zelte, ’ frosty locks, peared to be far away. ingin’, an’ blue | an’ bright wus the sky But the evenin’ bells wuz ringin’ 'fore the bird- songs ‘peared to die. “ Lwish I were a bird,” she said. He answered rude and rough, * You've got an elegant start, bécause You're certainly fly enough.” —Cleveland Plain Dealer. “Don't wish fer the time to fly so fast; it's | fast enough, God knows! Like a drop of dew on the daisy it shines in the light an’ goes. Life's like a dream that passes away with the evenin’ light— We only say good-mornin’ ‘fore it's time to say good-might.” \F YOouU’RE A KER : ah ~. —_ RWINCE THAT —Atlanta Constitution, Do you know why Evans’ bottle is upside down LISH : ported tam ‘Joka F, Dryden, Pres, Wome Ofee Kewart, H. 3, THE PLAZA HOT NS Fronting on Central EL som Park. ‘St. and Fifth Ave., New York. American or European Plan. Absolutely Fireproof. THE PLAZA HOTEL | comicbooks.com