Judge — November 19, 1898 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

COULD USE IT. Citer Ramiatn-THe-neck (who has made a raise from a reservation golfer) — “Waugh! Very good quiver for arrows, but heap poor pipe for smoke. Ugh!” AN OLD TURKEY. A YEAR ago, when times were hard But now, wnen times are good again And everything was rough, ‘And each one has enough, He dined on pork and, with the bard, . To carve the bird he strives in vain, Exclaimed, ** Well, this is tough !” And cries, ‘* Well, this is tough !” Je J. O'CONNELL. HIS HORRID HALLUCINATION. Attendant (in insane-asylum)—" That poor fellow over there is the most pitiable case in the institution. He weeps and bemoans his lot from morning till night, and nothing can be done to alleviate his distress of mind.” HER PUN. Visitor —" What is the nature of his hallucination?” “The shot had dropped out of the shell,” sald Fred; Altendant—* He believes that he is the husband of seven wives who are all coming eT beh the cal y pliessant liaay Cuat Gay fracas % Got up about twenty yards ahead ”. to visit him on the morrow. * And‘of course you missed the shot,” said May, A GOBBLER INTAGLIO,. THE gobbler dreams alone Upon the bough all day ; The winds about him moan ‘And in his whiskers play. To him they weirdly sing, ** The gravy ‘ll soon anoint Your drumstick and your wing, Your neck and second joint.” His weary wattles wag With visible unrest ; His spirits sadly sag, And woe 's his spirit’'s guest. Ob, still he sways and bobs ‘Unto the whirlwind’s zip, “ That echoes all the sobs ‘That down his wishbone drip. ‘The headsman {s one spook He tries to pat to flight ; Another is the cook Tn apron long and white, Ang so beneath his wing In sleep he drifts away Where there's no bell to ring ‘And no Thanksgiving day. 2X, MENIFEE, NOT MANY OF THEM. Little Johnnie—“ What's a philosopher, pa?” Brown—" At this time of year, my boy, it is a man who JUSTLY PROUD, is thankful for what he didn’t “I'm proud o' me mother, Bill. Ninety-nine year old teg-day an’ cuts all the wood fer the kitchen-fire.” get.” comicbooks.com