Judge — November 19, 1898 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE SCAPEGOaT. ERE is an interesting inquiry which came to hand a little while ago,” said the high- browed editor of the Petty- ville Plaindealer, extending the document in question to the friend who had just drop- ped in. The latter took it and read the wail of a subscriber who was troubled with a pain- ful goneness in his stomach— also in his family circle, the wife of his bosom having eloped with a horse-doctor— a dull gray taste in his mouth, distressing forebodings, pal- pitation of the heart, ghastly and ghostly rappings on the headboard of his bed at night, cold sweat, a strange twitch ing of his ears, friends who borrowed from him and paid not again, the still, small voice of conscience, the green- goods habit, boils, stuttering, a mortgage, and so on to considerable length ; and after reciting the list of his troubles he desired the scribe to dig deep into the vast accumulation of knowledge which all country editors are supposed to possess and tell him what, oh, what to do for each of his numerous ails, aches, woes and misfortunes. “ My stars!" commented the friend, “It will take you a long-time to prescribe the proper treatment for his many miseries.””” “Oh, no,” replied the: able editor promptly. “ We shall simply tell him to blame it all on Alger.” . HIS STATUS. Book-agent —“ What kind of a man is your neighbor, Mr. Puffedup?" Farmer Hornbeak —“ Wa-al, 1 cackerlate he imagines that there won't be any more wet weather this season unless he withdraws his ob- jection,” —_ A LESSON FOR OUR get Up from the table with an appetite. Parson Benge—‘' Talk erbout de temptation ob Saint Anthony !” Johnny ate at dinnertime more than was good for him, and when he went to bed at night he had a most terrible dream about himself. ates AR BIBLICAL COMPARISON, A REFLECTION. A CLEVER looking-glass, forsooth, In some respects ; for instance, this— Has place on Mabel’s mantel-shelf, You'll quick discern the simile— So dainty and so neat, in truth, A clever looking-glass it is, ‘Tis like its owner’s own sweet self A clever-looking lass is she : ROY FARMALL GREEXE, AN ICONOCLAST. Miss Tommey—" Mr. Bunting is a singular man.” Miss Filkins —“ How so?” Afiss Tommey—" He says he doesn’t like golf.” Miss Filkins —» But lots of men don’t like golf.” Miss Tommey—" Yes, but Mr. Filkins says he doesn’t care who knows it.” . wr 1 Og gah LEONE a r aa wins waaT wee or’ ee ge YOUNG READERS. Good children always comicbooks.com L : t ( '