Judge — September 24, 1898 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

NOT HIS IDEAL HEAVEN. “* So this is the ‘ shining shore,’ is it?* * Yes, it is.” Z PLEMRIAN —"* Weil, say, you ought to see Coney island.” THE UNORTHODOX JOSSES. LD Haw Hee, the idol-maker, being full of honorable years and many pains, died and left his business to his son, young Sing Yek, who had once been to Hong-Kong and{eonsidered himself wide between the eyes and eminently up to snuff. ‘ The old man left behind him a reputation for having manufactured reliable josses which performed their duties in a conservative and satis- factory manner, but he had been able to turn them out but slowly, and competition had so reduced the price that the business was only meagrely profitable, at best. This was not good enough for young Sing Yek. He wanted to rush things and get rich rapidly, and accumulate the double chins of opulence while yet his queue had not begun to turn gray. ‘Accordingly he went up to Hong-Kong again, and there caucused with a shifty-eyed acquaintance who had been to America and was full of the ways that are dark and tricks that are vain for which the enlightened occidental is peculiar. Soon after returning home Sing Yek announced that he was ready to supply all comers with a superior- made article of joss at half the usual price, and as a result was soon doing what is known in China as a land-office business. Every- body who had the price bought one or more of the cheap josses, and Sing Yek speedily waxed prosperous. No fault was to be found with the cut- rate idols, but ere long a change began to manifest itself in the people who had pur- chased them, The buyers seemed to be growing taller and thinner by degrees, their noses gradually took on a Romanesque shape; they began to step livelier, and their voices as- 1, Pat—“ Hal dicker the Their not marry 2. PaT—"* I wonder how I'll stop it, now thot it’s go uae FASTER THAN HE EXPECTED. it'sa an‘ down hill, an’ I kin git along the way.” sumed a nasal twang. But the most noticeable change in them was that, as they shook off the sloth of centuries, their love for bartering increased. was not very long till the village had become the habitat of a population of swappers who would rather trade than eat, and who could without effort the neighboring hamlets out of their eye-teeth. fore, but grew angular and lost their dimples while yet THE BATTLE-FLAG OF SPAIN. THE stately ship Maria Therese Lay rocking on the tides ; The foam was pearls upon her hull, And silver on her sides. Her sailors drowsed about the decks And dreamed of home again, And from the staff above her hung “The battle-Alag of Spain. That what a dawn of destiny In thunder on her broke! Her reeling decks were red with blood, Her banner black with smoke. She felt the breath of freedom pass, A flaming hurricane That tore in tatters from the staff The battle-flag of Spain. * Below the silken stars and stripes It hangs, a little square, ‘The remnants that a sailor's hand Has joined with patient care. For it has dwindled down to this— A nation’s pride and pain— ‘Three inches wide and six in length, The battle-flag of Spain. MONA TRYING, they should’ have been plump and pleasing. Here and there a man began to grow a sparse crop of whiskers on his neck and to acquire a cough which perpetually threatened to hack him into a consump- tive’s grave, but never did. Many-of them evinced a fondness for inventing mechanical devices; one created a contrivance which cut little bits of white wood into exact imitations of grains of rice, and Reva many bags of the deceptive but malnutritious cereal were bartered to the untutored inhabitants of the neighboring villages. This went on till most of the pebple of the hamlet had undergone a transmogrification which had caused them to lose nearly all of their origi- nal characteristics and be almost as a race apart from the inhabitants of the surrounding regions. This troubled them not, but there was in their midst at that time a venerable man of much wisdom who viewed with astonishment and regret the transformation going on among his fellow-citizens, and diligently sought the cause. After much investigation into the mys- tery he finally reduced the blame to belong- ing in some manner to the idols sold by Sing Yek; and at last, after calling to his aid a traveler who could read English, he found the reason in the legend: which was carved on the back of each joss, and ran as follows : “Made at Silas Leach’s turning-mill, North Huckabuck, Conn., U.S. A.” smooth bit av road an’ aisy the rest av It inhabitants of maidens did young, as be- 8. 1—!—t!! comicbooks \ yom