Judge — April 23, 1898 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

written about. I demurred at this, as Menlo park was a far journey from New York without a word of copy as a reward, “Oh, write anything you choose,” he said, “and I will stand by “ How about the din- ner-pills ?” “That would be fine,” he replied, with a laugh; * write that up.” On my way back to New York I developed a scheme and the next morn. ing the world was inform- ed with considerable cir- cumstance that Edison had devised a means and invented a machine by which the elements com- posing the ordinary foods could be extracted from the earth and put in cap- sules and so fed to men and women that kitchens and dining - rooms would no longer be necessary. One had but to set. the = THe victim — machine for a beefsteak with onions, THE vuLTURE — IRIENDS of Edison observe with regret his increasing deaf- ness, and some persons complain that it is difficult to talk to him with any satisfaction. 1 once in familiar talk with him ventured to say, * It must be a great deprivation to be so deaf?” “ Oh,” be said with a twinkle in his eye and a smile on his face, “it has its compensations. 1 can hear what I want to hear, and what I don’t want to hear the devil himself can’t make me.” ‘When Edison attacked the electric-light prob- Jem he was living at Menlo park, and he was so ab- sorbed in his work that he neglected to take prop- er nourishment, His wife (the first Mrs. Edison) was much worried, but he baffled all her efforts to get him to come home to luncheon and dinner. Finally she resorted to the plan of taking his meals into the shop. But he found it too much trouble to eat anything but sand- wiches, and on these he subsisted in a great measure for a long time. One day when I was there in search of news Mrs. Edison was reproaching him for his dis- regard of his health. He is a most amiable man and took what his wife said as a great joke. “ Well, I tell you what I'll do,” he said ; “I'll invent a pill that one can swallow and take a complete meal at one gulp.” We laughed and shortly afterwards I was told that there was nothing new to be Suape EDISON. FREE FROM PAIN, Blank it! | thought you were a painless dentist 7” Well, do | seem to be suffering any ?* WHAT PEOPLE /V7END TO SAY, AND WHAT THEY DO SAY. “T haven't slept three hours in A GREAT SMILE- PRODUCER, Snapshot, the photographer, was in despair of making Hockenstein ‘* look pleasant” until this brilliant idea was put into successful execution. (Preso!) say; feed it with earth, turn a crank, and a capsule would come out loaded with all the food-values in a gener- ous dish of the kind de- sired. Of course this was done as a joke and to raise a laugh, and without the faintest idea that any one would take it seriously. But some of the scientific and_ semi - scientific journals copied the ar- ticle and commented on it as though it were earnestly meant. Edi- son's mail grew larger than before, and half of his letters related to this dirt-eating and beefsteak-producing machine. The next time I saw him he laughed, shook his fist at me and exclaimed, “Oh, you young rascal! Oh, you villain, you!" Then he said half yusir roIKDExTeD. “By the gods of war! I'm going __ (The next morning.) down stairs to tell that janitor if he water lately—here'stwodollars—steam morning I'm going up stairs to tell yy eae hiind but a minute. Ob, don't get hot water up here in ten min- up a little, can’t you, please? Sotry I Mrs. Blank that she's got to get out of hat @ lovely baby he is! As a rule T tutes I'il break bis infernal neck.” can’t give you more this month,” this house with that squalling baby, 40n’t care much for boy babies, but I hate babies anyway.” yours is such a dear.’ “Ole—we've beenalittle shyonhot the past four nights. If I live till comicbooks.com