Judge — March 12, 1898 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

uae ARTIFICE. BOLD JACK becged a kiss From Celia, artless miss, Who softly answered this : “* Father is sitting in the ball.” And Jack, thus denied, Sat motionless beside ‘The maid who said and sighed, * But he can’t hear anything at all.” wavrex coast, NECESSARY PRECAUTION. Miss Saint Clair —“ But, dear, why are you so very particular about making calls only in perfect weather ?” Miss Vere de Vere—" Why, my child, if 1 didn’t go on the very loveliest days I might find some one at home!” POSSIBLE? Klondiker— No, 1 can't say that I con- sider the mosquitoes an unmitigated pest. SHE HAD IT WITH HER. Like the arrows shot by the enemies of Mr. Joxsinc —"“Ain’ got no pockets in dat Photo, by Schloss. Xerxes, they come in such clouds that they _lwbly ball-dress?' Whar yo! kyarry yo'r razzer?” CES F, es A Miss SNowRAL. De questshun am too JUDGE'S FAVORITES. hide the sun and enable us to work in the delikit tor admit ob present discushyun; but in GRACE FILKINS IN “THE KOVAL BOX.” shade all summer.” case ob necessity Ah wouldn’ hesitate to reveal ty te lady, Celia Pryve ‘Thus in the play are you presented, And, gentle Grace, in any guise site pate You lead we'll be contented tage-life were not so vain and hollow, Did'many your example follow. hits hidin’-place.”” NATURAL SEQUENCE. “1am fifty-three years old,” dignified- ly began the high-browed visitor, entering untothe able editor of the Ruralville Bazoo, “and have during those years acquired much of the wisdom which experience teaches. Iam what is commonly termed well-read, and have delved more than supetficially into several branches of science. I know something of the arts as well, have been an apt student of sociology, psychology and political economy, and, in fact, can truth- fully call myself erudite, astute and sagacious, almost to the pointof being a sage. And yet "— He paused impressively. Yeees, sir?” hesitated the editor, uncertain what was coming next. “And yet,” proceeded the stranger, “1 have pevreager than the Sir Wet gneqiioeas A KLEPTOMANIACAL SOMNAMBULIST. pei RS , Farser TRAreM—" This is a purty perdicament fer a minister uv th’ gospel to be cotched in Why — why “— stammered the scribe, weak PARSON FEATHERFLOCK—"‘An’ hit's lucky dat Ah is a ministah ; othahwise yo’ might’n beliebe and trembling with astonishment.“ 1—I'""— dat hit's jes’ dis yere habit ob sleep-walkin’ dat gits me intoe sich anpleasan’ sittywashuns,” Then two stalwart attendants came and led the editor's visitor away to the asylum from which he had made his escape a few hours before. HISTORY. Briton— Do you know that it isa matter of history that Wel- lington never saw Napoleon ?” Yankee —“Is that so? I always understood that he saw him and went him several better.” DIDN'T LOOK STRONG. HILE Maggie Whd her mother were away obitheir vacation Mr. Newcomb took the Opportunity to paint their wood-colored house white. “Don't you like it, Maggie?” asked HIS PREFERENCE. her father on the little lady's return, ‘THe INFANT PKODIGY— What shall I play for you to-sight, Uncle George?” “I would, papa.” she replied slowly, UncLe Groce —" Ob, go and play dead for a while—that's a good girl.” “ if—if it wasn’t so awfully pale.” comicbooks.com