Judge — January 1, 1898 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A QUESTIONABLE TRIUMPH. 1 si celine eT 1, Jones—"*Can’t open the mustard-box, my dear? Let me have it, All it wants is a little strength, — OUR CHRISTMAS DESSERT. [F PETERKIN is lite Pete, And a little lump is lumpkin, ‘Then lies within the pies we eat A little pump or pumpkin QUITE A DIFFERENCE. oe JOHN, dear,” whispered lit- tle Mrs, Justwed as she nestled her curl-papers against her husband's left shoulder-blade and got ready to go to sleep in an hour or two; “John, dear, 1 want to ask you something.” “Yes, my love,” gurgled her husband with an incipient snore, ‘I suppose you want to 1 Jue Jackson: his money, de nex’ oldes’ am gwine toe git six-tent' PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL. low did yo' eber cum toe propose toe de el Johnsing gals? She's homely as sin—not meanin’ no offense toe yo’. AbE Haxpcast (s/y/y)—"* W'y, ole Johnsing tol’ me conferdenshully jes’ how his will read. De younges’ daughtah am on'y gwine toe git five-tent’s ob mut de oldes' ob all am gwine toe git seben-tent’s ; so yo’ see it wuz fo' mah policy toe choose de oldes’.”” would be doing now if I hadn't gone down stairs in my bare feet and put her out, or some- thing equally im- portant, don’t you?* A silence that could be felt suc- ceeded this brutal rejoinder. It could be very much felt, inasmuch as little Mrs. Justwed’s. si- lent tears began to percolate through her husband's robe de nuit and touch up his spinal epi- dermis like the still small voice of con- science. This was I. —What in the deuce is the matter with ask me what I think the cat — this dratted lid-cover, anyhow ?— uage dest ob de COULDN'T Walt, ‘ould yer gimme a lift?” in you wait till T draw on these boots?" too much for even his hardened nature. Shifting his left wing 80 as to cut off from her base of supplies as much as possible, he inquired penitently, that was it you wished to ask me, lovie?” why,” she sobbed, “w-week after next is Christmas, and y-you used to s:say before we were married th-that you con- sidered it a p-positive luxury t-to be allowed to b-buy me Christ- mas presents, a-and I was only going t-to ask y-you if y-you s-still thought s-so—th-that was all.” My dear,” said her husband at once, kindly and instruct- ively; ““ my dear, is it possible you do not realize the vast glac moraine existing between a luxury and a necessity?” LIKELY, Dr. Smiley—"b, professor, is your little one a boy or a girl?” Professor Dremey —"Why—er—yes. We call it John. It must be a boy, | think.” n UTSIDE Decem- ber's chill, Behind our shutters, lo! Good fires, good cheer, good will, Glad hearts and Christmas glow ! shall paint the house yellow for dear George's sake. He liked the color, and—and you know he died of liver- trouble.” EALLY and truly, your bald-headed friend will be pleased if you give him a hair-brush. IV, —I've got it!" comicbooks.com