Judge — November 20, 1897 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE LOCATION OF HIS INTELLECT. RICKLEY put his feet into the steaming water and lay back with a sigh of satis- faction. “Ah” said he,“ that makes my brain ever so much clearer.” “Which justifies a suspicion I have held for several years,” said the perspiring Mrs. B. grimly. KNEW WHAT IT MEANT. Stranger—" Do you know what it is, my young friend, to hover between hope and fear—to wonder what the outcome will be when the bitter struggle is over?” Young man—“1 do. If there’s one thing more than another that I detest it is a breach-of-promise suit.” BRIDGET’S COMMAND. Mattie—" Now, Bridget, as mamma is away I will help you get breakfast in the morning if you will wake me early.” Bridget— Oi don’t nade no hilp at all, Jist shlape, an’ don’t yez dress an’ cum down till yez wake up.” th’-slot machine.” BELIED ITSELF. ** Phwat do thot soign rade?” ** Street closed.” “Shure, Oi tought it wor open.”” ON THE GRIDIRON. WE WHO are going forth to fight Salute you, ladies, where Ye sit and gaze in rapt delight Upon our wondrous hair. Perchance our militant array And yells excite your dread ‘That Victory, come when she may, Will find us mostly dead. Be calm! We hold ourselves too dear; We battle for your love. ‘We much prefer the angels here To those in heaven above, WILLARD KEYES, ALL THE EAR-MARKS. x Guyer—" Samson must"have been a populist.” A DREAD SECRET. Waccte! id yer know, Jimmy, dat we has a terrible skeleton in our fam'ly-closet ?” Wot is it?” * Me fader was a prohibitionist.” Dewtell—" What makes you think so?" Guyer —“ Why, the minute he had his hair cut he ceased to be great.” PATIENCE ON A MONUMENT. OrFicer Groocin—"* Phwat are yez waitin’ fer?” Farmer Haveick—" Fer my change. I dropped a dime in thet penny-in- AS HE UNDERSTOOD IT. ++ BENNY,” asked the Sunday-school teacher, “ what is your idea of a hypocrite?” “A feller that pretends to think that an- other feller’s bike is better than his,” replied Benny Bloobumper. COULDN'T GO BACK ON IT. Foot-ball captain—“We are sure to lose the game without. Peterby.” Half-back—" Can't help it. Here's a cer- tificate saying he is in no shape to go on the field.” Foot-ball captain— From his physician?” Half-back—" No; from his barber.” THOUGHTFUL, Dominico Spigetti made no mistake when he took his wife along with him to the Klondike. comicbooks.com