Judge — October 2, 1897 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE. ‘one of the ears off from Major Johnson, but, on the other hand, it must be conceded that the major had no right, even jocularly, to allege that the colonel’s mining claims vidious expressions are to be deplored, as tending not only to the exchange of hostilities, but also in view of their influence upon foreign , are not worth their salt. Suc! A GENERAL CRY OF FIRE, 1, Tue poss —" Now, Pat, keep your eyes open and make yourself generally useful, ABLE TO ENDURE ANYTHING. +6] DO not see how you could possibly have endured the terrible cold of an Alaskan winter,” said the man who had stayed at home. “Oh, it seemed almost a mere nothing to me,” replied the returned Klondiker. “You see, I had often slept in the spare bedroom of a New England farm-house.” DIFFERENT KINDS, Broxety—"' If I had an air-ship I should go to Klondike.” Joxeny If you had an heirship you wouldn't need to.” ape FROM THE KLONDIKE “DAILY 7 GOLDBUG.” OvR citizens should not be too censorious of the municipal water-service. While there has undoubtedly been some cause for complaint, the fault is not, the mayor assures us, with the water-department, which is doing all in its power to prevent the accumulation of the gold nuggets and quartz which have choked the pipes and prevented the free flow of water. Citizens will recognize the reasonableness of this explanation and govern themselves accordingly. The affair which occurred last Tuesday in the Lone Dog saloon has been much exagger- ated by special correspondents who infest this region and seem to delight in misrepresentation of its leading citizens, It is to be regretted, of course, that Colonel Brown was obliged to shoot capital seeking investment in our midst, and timid as capital always is. Major Johnson's ear may not have been lost in vain should the incident impress upon the thoughtless and jocosely inclined the ad- vantages of a discreet tongue. Incidents illustrating the richness of the Klon- dike region continue to come to our notice. At One-eye diggings, three miles north of here, a stranger who came here on a prospecting tour from New York city stopped for dinner at Jim Bludsoe’s palatial restaurant and wet-goods dispensary. He remarked, while eating, upon the somewhat gritty character of the potatoes. Upon concluding his repast it was We learn also that a well-to-do farmer from Ohio, who struck the Klondike region last week with cash to exchange for a promising in- vestment, concluded negotiations with two of our prominent citizens iz, and left town the same evening the proud possessor of several hand- " noticed that his teeth were filled with gold. ‘=z some gold bricks. 2, Pat—"'Th’ man thot put wather in these foire-pails didn't know his busi- ness. — wants to,” NO ROOM FOR IT. 66] LL bet that man lives in a flat.” “What makes you think so?” “His dog's tail is cut off.” JUDGING BY SIZE. Little Bobbie (gazing at the calf)—" Oh, I know. That's the cow that gives condensed milk.” GOOD FOR A WHOLE YEAR, Custoser—'* Do you guarantee these porous plasters to be good for a weak back ? Druccist—"* Yes, sir; they are good for a week back—and for a month to come after you put them on.” The Klondike paving company, limited, has been incorporated since our last issue. It is rumored that its incorporators are figuring on a contract to re-pave the streets of the New Jerusalem, We desire to call the attention of our subscribers to the request already made, that subscriptions be paid in cord-wood and vegetables, The office-boy is tired of stacking up nuggets in the ante-room, and the editor's wife and children can’t eat gold. The national convention of the Klondike reform party is in session at Dawson City as we go to press. they kin shtart a foire whiniver they 4. THE noss—"* You're fired! And if you don’t get out quick I'll fire this whole pail at you.” It is understood to be the pro- gramme to declare for the single diamond standard, the party leaders holding that the baser gold metal must inevi- tably drive out the better cur- rency should the present {ree and unlimited bimetallic dia- mond and gold currency sys- tem be continued. ALaexT &. wor. 6s RENNI cake?" " Meat-pie with berries "stead o’ meat in it.” what is short- comicbooks.com