Judge — June 13, 1896 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

W. J. Arce. Baxnnano Gita TM. Guecony, Editor PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNETRD STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE, One copy, one year. of s2 numbers - $5.0 One copy. six months. or 26 numbers - 2.50 One copy, for thirteen weeks - 1.35 Inclading the Cuxistaas Jvocr. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all foreien countries in the postal union, $0.00. year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (JupGr BUILDING) Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street. New York. $97 W’e euavantes advertisers a larger circulation that any other American satiri- cal paper published. The Jv Sy Avenue de The Internatio backs Newer &. “Witbin, Gonrva, Switertand £7 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS. —The contents of Junge are protected by copy- fnght in bot ited States and Great Kritain, promptly and vigorously prosecuted. peor Infringement of this copyright will be TION is the best finance, H* RRISON is in the Adirondacks, and the woods are full of him. HE EASY BOSS is improperly so called, There isn’t another man any- where who is so uni THE COLLAR of Warner Miller got so warm that he tore it off with unex- ampled violence and haste. H 2 SCORCHER sometimes gets acci- dentally killed, and we doubt if he stops his rapidity even then. ME REED knows when he is whipped; but Mr. Platt will be a doubting ‘Thomas long after his funeral. PROGRAMME for St. Louis—MeKin- ley by acclamation and Benjamin Tracy of New York on the first ballot. EYLER ought to look upon the in- surgents as newspaper correspond- ents and order them out of the country. CUBAN It MAY BE that Mr. Cleveland's health will oblige him to decline a renom- ination; and then again it may be that only that will give it to him. EF polit L authorized to s sand m Cheshire cheese. y that Mr. Platt is about to retire from y presently be found only in the depths of his RESIDENT of pessimists, and undertaker for the universe. this melancholy man, “is wrong.” LOT of Harvard college is prince of mugwumps, king * Whatever is,” says THRE id the others for forty years each; but the publisher of the dime- novel has his liberty and doubtless much wealth. = BOYS, readers of dime-novels, have gone to prison, one for life HE QU as to where Governor Matthews stands is not inter- esting, He doesn’t stand, He is moving around on tiptoe, looking anxiously for the place he can most easily get av THE PARTY wi a balloon w preva y from. from Sweden to the north pole claims to have “make progress to windward. ation than was the one which gave the pole to } That is an abler ansén. PERRY BE ONT heard himself mentioned for governor of this state, and st: ted for Europe by the very next steamer. The late Mr. Robert Acres had more courage in the tips of his fingers than any Democrat mentioned for any office has in his entire body. WAR-NOTE. A fill-or-bust-er. A NEW PERIL, SPANISH PAPER thinks that in case of a war between Spain and this country the southern states would secede and join the Spaniards, and asa result the union of states would smash itself into minute par- ticles. There are many perils of this kind that are a great comfort to foreign powers that don’t know anything about it. THE HOLMES ROMANCE. MB: HOLMES at first claimed twenty-seven murders; but on the scaf- fold he claimed only two killings, and those the result of accident. If Mr. Holmes might have lived a few days longer he might have become an angel of sweetness and light. It takes a long time for a murderer to recover from his confessions in behalf of the daily newspaper. THE LADY IS READY. HE STORY that Milan of Servia will come to America to find an heiress to officiate as bride to his son, King Alexander, is not at all unlikely, He needs the money, and so does the young man; and there is no other part of the world that is as anxious to contribute it as this. And what is money in comparison with the glory aid suffering involved in being a sixth-rate queen? A GENEROUS ABSTINENCE, DE: TALFOURD celebrates his liver by giving two hundred and fifty dollars to a London temperance hospital in token of the fact that he has drank nothing in fifty-six years. Both pain and triumph are suggested in this generosity ; but the truth probably is that the dear old fellow is so constituted that anything stronger than the effervescent but soulless pop would give him both agony and humiliation, HILL’S AMBITION. ENATOR HILL declares with great frequency and positiveness that he doesn’t want the nomination of his party for president. That looks like wisdom, but it may be merely a disinclination to adopt the brass-band business, We sus- pect that if the tail of somebody's aban- doned boom comes around his way he'll grab it. Why does he defend Cleveland ? Not for love of the president, surely, but perhaps for a certain kind of affection for the aid and comfort of Cleveland's friends, SOME DELAYED SMOKE. W2LTER WELLMAN, writing for the Chicago 7imes-Herald, says the president would have recognized the Cubans as belligerents two months ago but for the danger of war with Spain. ‘That wouldn't amount to much of itself; but England would have acted with Spain, taking that method of settling the Venezuela question, ‘The proposition is reasonable; and it is therefore to be hoped in behalf of Cuba that a war in South Africa between England and Germany will.begin without any further disgraceful delay. RIGHTS OF THE CITIZEN. HE FLEMING MURDER CASE in this town again draws attention to the jury system. It took twelve days to get a jury in that case, and no man was eligible whose services were worth having. Why not, as the JUDGE has suggested, have professional jurors as well as professional lawyers? Why not pay them suitably for their work? Why take a citi- zen from his business against his will, and make a serf of him for a period great or small? ~Why should the law be a tyrant and a usurper of men’s rights, and for less than the pay of a common laborer ? WE AND THE OTHER MONARCHS, SRY WATTERSON, who is in Europe, writes that there isn't a monarch who doesn’t hate America; that our ambassador to Eng- land should not make speeches and should carry himself with an air of armed complacency; and that the man who toadies to court favor " merely ingratiates himself in the rather disdainful tolerance with which the man with a title looks down upon the commoner.” That kind of tolerance is a matter of custom, education and breeding—rather bad breeding, but un- avoidable; but think of an ambassador to St. James who attended no dinners, or who, if he did, made no speech! gestion that there be no ambassador at all. It is equivalent to the sug- comicbooks.com