Judge — May 30, 1896 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

wuape- W. J. Anwat, eannano GILLAM TM. Bi Gurcony, £ditor. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. ONITRD STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE, One copy, one year. or $2 numbers - $5.00 ‘One copy, six months, or 20 numbers - 2.50 One copy, for thirteen weeks - 435 Z Inclading the Cumtstmas Juoce. PORBIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To alt forcien countries in the postal union, $0.00 year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Junce BuILpING), Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. CPW 'e guarantee advertisers a larger ci cal paper published. Jation than any other American satiri- I News Cos Besams Beteding, © 4 Cable addre Brentane' all for sale 125 Newcastle street, Strand, London? wcery Lane, B.C, London: at Saar: jermany: The International News Co., Stephanstrasse ind ry Ch. E. Alioth, Geneva, Switseriand. DGRARK.” "9 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Jovce are protected by copy- fight in both the United States and Great Hintain. Lofringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. SPRING SIGN by General Weyler—" Keep off my trocha.” THE SULTAN would have been a bet- ter man in the shah’s place. HE OPPOSITION of Mr. Platt is worth millions to the sweet boom of the McKinley. FORAKER says he is tired of polities and wants to go abroad, There's another streak of luck for the Ohio Na- poleon, wee BootH-Tuck ER having advertised himself as a slummer, it won't be long before he will begin to lose his dia- monds. THE UNDERTAKERS' TRUST akes funerals so expensive that death has become a luxury and only the rich can afford it. MB. CHAMBERLAIN has been heard to remark to himself that there is such a thing as having too infernally vig- orous a colonial policy. eee JOHN HAYS HAMMOND hoped to have a little government of his own, so that he might not be obliged to call on ours for aid and consolation. THE OTHER DAY forty-seven women law-students were graduated from the New York university, and chivalry de- mands that we shall all begin to quarrel to the bitter end. the eleventh floor)— UNCLE” RAYNES (soeakiy THERE IS A HINT for Paul Krueger in the Corinto affair. The dam- ages he claims ought to be paid in full, and England has a habit of collecting her claims of that kind. A HEADING in a newspaper reads, Mrs. Ferguson yields to old ae When the lady reads that announcement of her death she will fag her harp aside in order to tear her hair. eee ++] WANT nobody who doesn’t want me,” says a young Massachusetts wife whose husband has run away with a pretty girl Nobody but a fool would abandon a woman as sensible as that. ORATOR COCKRAN dislocated his hip by falling from a bievele, but those who heard his coments on the circumstance say his oratorical language was passionate and eloquent and without a flaw. [" HAS BEEN evident for some time, remarks the Chicago 7ymes- Herald, hat Reed was reckoning without his host. poor McKinley? How could the help it when the host had pretty nearly all gone over to ZN MIXED QUALMS. VATOR AUTOCRAT (making a swift, down start from cross atween how I felt on my steamer-trip tew Yurrup an’ when 1 wuz larnin’ tew smoke my fust segar.” A GREAT FINANCIER. THERE MUST be some ability in the make-up of the prince of Wales. No ordinary man could have borrowed several millions of Baron Hirsch, and persuaded him in a diplomatic way to cancel the debt in his will, Perhaps the baron put this lost money on his list of charities, but with the prince it must have been a matter of genuine business. WHY? CARD-PLAYING was abolished on a New Jersey railroad largely patronized by commuters because a card-table cut a man nearly in two during a destructive collision, About the same time an old locomo- tive on the same road blew up and killed its engineer and fireman, Why, to be wise and consistent, didn’t the company abolish its locomotives ? VERY HIGH TREASON. F THE BOERS had attacked any portion of Great Britain with the design of capturing it and setting up a government of their own, and especially if during the proceedings they had killed several Englishmen, their leaders at least would have been hanged and the damages would have been very large. Now it’s a poor rule that doesn’t work both ways. MR. ISCARIOT IN OUR POLITICS. SEVERAL SILVER MEN have spoken favorably of Judas Iscariot in comparison with several sound-money men. It is not surprising in view of that gentleman's silver transaction a long time ago. He was so radical in behalf of the metal, however, that he sold his soul for it. We feel sure that the silver . man of to-day would stop with the be- r 'trayal of the business interests of his suf- \ . fering country. 14H }) | ELevaToR IN rn yy THE CRIME OF LIBERTY. GENERAL WEYLER was going to wind up the Cuban revolution in six- ty days. He said it himself. They have a very queer article of time down there. however, and he now thinks it may take two years according to their calendar. Meanwhile the murdering is going on, on both sides, and there isn’t humanity or courage enough in all the rest of the world to put a stop to it. There is more or less civilization in existence somewhere, but it is timid and very much. afraid of itself, GREAT HASTE. THE PEOPLE of “Cripple Creek are both active and enterprising. They had two fires in quick succession, and while the destruction was going on they planned to build the town over again, Then, to expedite matters, they blew up a hotel with dynamite, previously overlook- ing the somewhat humane proposition that they ought to notify its guests to get out of it. We never heard of such enter- prise before, and if the victims might be resurrected they would probably empha- size the fact. feel. uncle? By gum! I dunno, Sorter a INTERNATIONAL LAW. HE IMPROPRIETY of congress or the president interfering with what is called British justice in the case of Mrs. Maybrick is a sol- emn thing; but the impropriety of sending an innocent woman to prison for life is both astonishing and sad. If, moreover, it was proper to protest against French injustice in the case of the black ex-representative, and if it is proper to pray for the pardon «f John Hays Hammond by the Transvaal government, if is difficult to see why the proprieties should suffer through justice toa woman far more wronged than they. ROBBING THE GRAVE. ONE PROFESSOR WALTERS of New Jersey claims that he died and was buried in Washington; that he went to heaven, where he aw and got a telegram from Saint Peter; that he is appointed by divine authority to rule over this country, and that he will occupy the presidential chair as soon as Cleveland gets out of it. We look upon this as a bid for the Chicago nomination, which no live man wants. The absence of can- paper to put up the late Daniel and everybody knows how often Andrew Jackson has beet ¢ the period of his death, didates has induced a southern Democra Manning. nominated comicbooks.com