Judge — May 9, 1896 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

4 Braxwaro Gittas M. Guecone, Editor. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITRD STATS AND CANADA IN ADVANCR One copy, one year. of s2 numbers - $5.0 One cous. six months, or 36 numbers = 2-s6 One cop¥. for thirteen weeks ~ Including the Custsraas JuDce. FORKIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all foreign countries in the postal unign, $0.00 a year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupcr BuiLpinc). Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. 135 CRT I’e guarantee advertisers a larger circulation than any ocher American satiri- cal paper published. The Jowin, Juvue’s Linkary and Juan's Quantauty are all for sale at Brentane's, ie def Opera P Smith, Ainsice & Co.,25 Newcastle itreet, Strand, Le ional News Con, Breams Building. Chancery Lane, E. Cu London: at S i <The Intermational News £97 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS —The contents of Juvce are protected by copy- fnghit in both the United States and Great Kruain. Infringement of this copyright will be prompily and vigorously prosecuted. WHEN GREEK meets Yank then comes the tug of war. T HAS been remarked by the convivial person that absinthe makes it dearer. SPEAKING OF POLI- TICS, the king of Abyssinia appears to be among the Menelek. [ IS POSSIBLE that © H. H, Holmes reveled as much in his confession as he did in his crimes. MR. DEP EW some- times talks of own volition, and he is most interesting at those times, R. CLEVELAND needn't worry him- self. He may get a fourth nomination, but he can’t get a third term. VICTORIA and Hetty Green are among the richest women in the world; but Mrs. O. H, P. Belmont is certainly the Ikky¥—"" Blease oxchange blaces mid me, Vatsy abischnanaed Paray—"" Fer phwat do yex want ¢his place? Kuy— [N HAY they celebrated the death of Hippolyte with a revolution, They Wways celebrate that kind of thing that way. M® HILL will be a large man at Chicago, and if the nomination is forced upon him he won't break his neck in trying to get away from it. R. JAMESON dislikes notoriety. Modest man, Let him have the privilege of leading or driving a few hundred men into their graves and he will be quite satisfied. THE CORRUPTION in the recent elections in Spain threatens the throne. The proud and sensitive people of Spain do not like to be stepped on any more than docs anybody else. MBS. TOOKER of Kansas tied her husband to a beam and mercilessly flogged him because he had lost eighty-four dollars at poker, If ‘Tooker had lost a hundred the woman would probably have killed him: and what Kansas has long needed is a law abolishing wile-beating. BROTHER REED must take the second place on the presidentia racer. If he refuses he will commit the error of vaulting away over the horse's back, thus giving McKinley and the animal the liberty to run from him. Possibly the horse will come back at the end of four years; but what a long, long time that is to wait, NASALLY tANDICAPPED., 1d’s der only von I can get my eyes up glose to der knot-holes und see der game at.” GOOD TRAITS. [TIS frequently remarked that Spain is a proud and sensitive nation. ‘Vrue enough; and Cubans are proud and sensitive men. So also of the men in South America who have freed themselves from Spanish rule. It is well to be proud and sensitive; but one kind of men is as much en- titled to that distinction «s another kind. A CASE OF THEFT. DB: MORGAN'S EXCUSE for stealing a sermon was that he was exhausted from the labors of holy week. One would like to accept it in bebalf of a good man who never hooked anything before; but any kind of theft or robbery may have the same explanation. And it is per- haps more reprehensible to steal brains than to filch money or groceries. THE PERIL OF WEALTH. POVERTY has its privileges. No newspaper can marry a poo: girl to the man she dislikes, or the man she never got acquainted with. But heaven help the very rich young woman! She is engaged by the news- paper to a dozen different persons before she even begins to think of a di vorce. She might as well be an actress, with no right of privacy whatever. HINT TO THE PEACE SOCIETIES. N CASE OF WAR with anybody this country ought to be permitted to send out a few of its athletes and settle the whole business, That would be less expensive than to arm and discipline a large military or naval force, and far less bloody and disagreeable. Since there must be a test of strength, let it be representative rather than general, according to all civilized legislation. OUR AMERICAN NOBILITY. ICTURES and de- scriptions of the duch- ess of Marlborough at the Blenheim establishment will create a more ardent desire on the part of the American heiress to mar- ry a foreign title, and the demands for American money by the latter will gohigh. Everybody wish- es the duke and the duch- ess the utmost happiness; but these things cannot be evened up until we have titles of our own, ‘There is no other way. MEAN POLITICS. THE ABLEST ARG! MENT against Mc- Kinley for president is presented by the Platt newspapers, seconded to . some extent by the news- papers favoring Reed and some other candidates. This sort of thing is not unusnal. but the managers of the newspapers are going to be very sorry for it. The comparatively few Republican oppo- nents of McKinley have a right to stand by their favorites, but they are not going to use the Ohio man for a stepping-stone to their ambition, He and his friends won't have it. THE SOUL AND THE OLD FLAG, GENERAL BOOTH before the late salvation unpleasantness had an ardent dislike of Americans and American ways, and proposed to split the union and take in Canada in plage of the discarded portions. No wonder the Ballingtons revolted. They had American money, American friends, and American sympathy, and it would have been wicked to repu- diate them. The revolt was therefore a Christian duty and the Ballingtons have no right to do anything but stand firm in the position they have taken. WOMAN AND CHURCH. THE WOMEN of the church ought to have the right to participate in church conferences. They are the seed of the church, and but for them the number of the church-goers would be small. ‘The principle of no taxation without representation is as good in the church as out of it, and the revolt proposed by a Brooklyn lady last year would have very large support if fairly begun. ‘This lady had been a church-goer many years and had liberally contributed to the expenses of her organization, yet she was obliged to keep silence and had got very tired of it. But what a flut- ter there wouid be if, on the other hand, women were obliged to keep talking in the churches. comicbooks.com