Judge — April 25, 1896 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Bexewarn Greta nncony, Editor. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCA One copy, one year. or sz numbers «$5.00 One’copy, six months, or 26 numbers 2.40 One copy. for thirteen weeks ~ 135 Including the Cunistwas Juocr. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To alt forcirm countries in the postal union, $0.00 year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupcr BuiLpinc), Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. $B We puarantee advertisers a larger circulation than any other American satiri- cal paper published. Breams Building. Chancery Lane, E. Co, Germany: The International News Cox Step Alicth, Geneva, Switserland. 27 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Juvcs are protected by copy- right in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. ‘TOO MUCH LIBERTY is allowed the prisoners at Sing Sing. We see that that place has gone Democratic, . [T TAKES a scoundrel to needlessly cut down in an hour a tree which it has taken fifty years to grow. THERE WAS ONE good thing about the report that Whitcomb Riley was going to die, It wasn’t so. THE SUNDAY NEWSPAPER is not altogether given up to horrors, because some space must be reserved for scandals. | hi ] anvil BY THE WAY. there's Brother Rus- sell A. Alger. He is so dark that he can’t be seen, and he doesn’t pro- pose to run until he gets there. THE LEGISLATURE of Kentucky didn’t want to stab itself to death, but it looked upon Governor Bradley asa fine substitute for the corpse. THomas HARDY, they say, looks as if he were always recovering from a severe illness. We suspect that man of reading some of his own books. BRott R REED was seen to go out with a lighted lantern the other night, and was heard to inquire in a hoarse whisper, boom lately ? en anything of my Nanste. Goat (b/eating)— ~ MR. MAHER (fndignantly)—' TIMES ARE I R. We getay rchs nip game phic Op thousand jokes a day regarding the new light, and every one of them shows that the salary of a worker has been raised ten dollars. ‘ Ce NOTHING BUT HEAVEN,” says -Max_O'Rell, “can. be. prettier than an American girl,on her bicycle.” Aye, aye! The more we see of that girl the better.we like her. A WOMAN in New Hampshire who is one hundred years old -and attributes her great age to. piety ought to have a second childhood in order to enjoy a little thoughtless, heedless, careless.fun: MAN who knows how to catch trout will never kill himself in April; and if he catches a cold that leads to serious sickness the memories involved will be such medicine as will make him live as long as he can. HAVE GROWN murder of thot attract unusua so familiar with dispatches announcing the ds of Christians by Turks that they no longer It is an astounding fact. ‘The nations have hardened their hearts against them, and the churches, though not indiffer- ent, have to a large extent ceased to discuss them. ‘That is degeneracy. attention. Ma-ha-ha-ha !" thot mocks my name phin Oi pass here THE IMPERIAL LAW. T IS TRUE that Mrs. Maybrick was wrongly convicted, but what is that in comparison with the confession that would be involved in her release that English law sometimes makes a mistake? It is true that injustice by the law is crime; but if the crime is rectified as far as possible something of the law's awful dignity is sacrificed—and that will never, never do. DESPERATE REMEDIES. THE REVEREND ANNA SHAW says she will remain in California until that state gives women the right of suffrage. The lady is des- perate enough; but we are glad she doesn’t adopt the political foolishness of the Jerseyman who didn’t shave for many years because New Jersey didn’t get a certain kind of governor. But women are changing rapidly. We expect to see that woman yet. AMBITIOUS AGE, HE LATE MR. TILDEN struggled so hard to appear young and healthy that the struggle killed him. There ought to be a warning for our later governor in this thing. Then there is the too ambitious liar. When he says, in the Buffalo Express, that Mr. Morton milks all the cows on his farm before breakfast he exerts himself too dangerously. Or per- haps he means to say that Mr. Platt SS docs the milking? THE RICE IN HIS HAT. THERE IS MUCH in Harrison's hint that there is a difference be- tween volunteering and being drafted. Harrison may differ from Artemus Ward, who said firmly, during the | war, “If I'm drafted I shall resigi The success of McKinley invites com- binations that may easily include the ex- president. Andaman young enough to marry has ambitions other than those of that kind, As we have already sug- gested, ask Mrs. Harrison. ll ———f|| R. K. AS A PAPA, WE HAVE the information from one source that Rudyard Kip- ling is tired of Vermont and wants to return to England, and from another that a babe has been born to him. The inference is obvious, but we warn Mr. Kipling that he can't escape a legiti- mate responsibility in that way. Let him put up his hands and face the music. It will do him great good. Many reporters want to interview him, and after a close acquaintance with the child he will learn to tolerate them—or anybody else. THE MAN OF WRATH. It HARDLY seems possible for Hill to be the Democratic candidate for governor of New York this fall, and especially when he must run, if at all, on a platform in behalf of home rule for cities and in opposition to Rooseveltism and the Raines law, He has had that experience once, even to the essence of the liquor business, and when he got out of it it seemed to the general public, including himself, as. if he had encountered all the ragged edges of a large saw-mill, But if he doesn’t rin for governor what can he do? » Such men as Hill never retire and never die. ‘Av Oi lay oyes an th’ voice ‘shut aff his wind.” THE MIXED JURY. THE HALF-AND-HALF JURY, composed half of men and half of women, is more likely to, be an absurdity than a success, In divorce and similar cases it is“quite impossible for men and women to take the same views. They cannot occupy the same standpoint, and their under standings of situations and facts are totally different. Men are just as a rational conclusion, and women are to a considerable extent influenced by prejudice. The half-and-half. jury would inevitably disagree in most cases, or its verdict would be a matter of suffering and endurance, But is it fair to women to keep them out of the jury-box? Not at all, And as for the harmonizing of the fact and the justice, you can fix it yourself; we can’t. comicbooks.com