Judge, 1895-09-14 · page 3 of 16
Judge — September 14, 1895 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Judge Magazine Page 163 This page contains three distinct humor pieces: 1. **"Pale Pills for Pink"** (top): A rural scene showing a farmer with a horse and gate, apparently advertising patent medicine—a common product satirized in Judge for making dubious health claims. 2. **"No Comparison"** (middle): A brief exchange mocking Jersey mosquitoes, a standard regional joke format of the era. 3. **"Miss Mary Ellen Eastside and Her Brother Bob"** (bottom): A domestic humor piece about working-class life, where Mary Ellen's brother Bob complains about her not cooking or letting him rest, depicting period gender roles and class tensions humorously. The page primarily showcases **everyday humor rather than political satire**—focused on rural life, patent medicine absurdity, and working-class domestic frustrations typical of Judge's miscellaneous content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
PLENTY OF HAY Faraer Brows —"*Got yer hayin’ most all done?” pcm ere FARMER GREENE (slightly deaf)—"* Hay?" 1 meen . f ae « FARMER BROWN Cheutingy Got yer hayin’ most all done 7" Faxser Brown —* Git up, Banquet ; thet ole fool ‘ll be hayin' ferever. leather apurn an’ take my biscuits for sinkers; an’ he won't stay in the house when I’m practicin’, neither; an’ says if I go doin* anything more to my hair he’s goin’ to take me to a barber an’ have a reg'lar state’s-prison cut on it. But, as I was a-sayin’, he’s real good-hearted ; tole a feller he lied when he said me an’ Mabel was a-flirtin’ on the L; an’ when his boss’s wife got me a chance to go on the “ workin’- girls’ vacation” up in Connecticut he giv me a little money to be amongst the pay ones, so ‘t 1 wouldn't feel cheap. But one Sunday las’ summer he caught me dancin’ on th’ Rockaway boat. Mabel an’ me was waltzin’, an’ I didn't know ‘the was aboard till he come up an’ separated us; an’ I was so supprised ‘t I said, “Why ! have you been on all the way?” Such a fool thing to ask! An’ he jest glared at me an’ says, “No. I jest lit down from a balloon from the top of the statoo of liberty.” Well, he treated us an’ took us home all right, an’ didn’t tell ma; but next mornin’ he says to her, “That girl's got to + go to work agin. She's gittin’ entirely too frivolous.” An’ I didn’t care a whack, for I was gittin’ tired o’ loafin’ anyhow. MADELINE ORVIS. NO COMPARISON, STRANGER —"‘Are those the famous Jersey mosquitoes they tell about ?” JexseyiTe—" Lord, no! them 's nothin’ but crows.” MISS MARY ELLEN EASTSIDE AND HER BROTHER BOB. EVERY oncet in a while I git awful tired o' work. ‘Then me an’ Mabel manages to git ourselves fired if we can. It’s easy enough to do it when work's slack; an’ it’s easier then to square the folks too; but when work ‘s brisk, if we come late, or take a day off, or git excused with the toothache too often they jest dock our pay; that’s all. But my brother Bob ‘s a kind of a soft-hearted duffer, an’ sometimes he'll say to ma, “ Mother, Mary Ellen seems to be lookin’ kind o* peaked like. I guess you better let her quit work an’ help you for a while.” Now, he knows well enough ‘t ma won't let me help her none, an’ he won't eat a thing 't I cook. ‘ SU iend tee eran Makes out he's goin’ to use one o' my pies for a