Judge, 1895-08-31 · page 3 of 16
Judge — August 31, 1895 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Judge Magazine Page 131 This page contains satirical humor columns and illustrations typical of Judge magazine's format. The text sections include: **"Child's Composition on Names"** - light satire on children's literal interpretations of language and nicknames. **"A Universal Failing"** - joke about a son with literary aspirations but no output. **"Full-Blooded"** - pun-based humor about dog breeding. **"Ill-Timed"** - brief joke about selective memory. The center features a large illustration of "Our Slanguage" - appears to be dock workers or laborers using working-class vernacular, with a blind man and legless man having difficulty understanding their speech patterns. **"Jesting Phyllis"** is a poem about a clever girl named Phyllis. The bottom cartoons show slapstick humor involving a banana peel causing mishaps - classic physical comedy of the era. The page is primarily entertainment-focused rather than political commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Suadge CHILD’S COMPOSITION ON NAMES. F IT were not for names they would call you calf, or something of that sort. If you ain't christened you can’t have any name. Nicknames are when you have a name and don’t like it and get called something else. Slippers is a nickname for shoe. A UNIVERSAL FAILING. Friend —" Your son, 1 understand, has literary aspirations. Does he write for money ?” Father ({eelingly)—" Unceasingly. - FORTUNATE. ‘61 T'S a good thing you married a chemist, Nancy; you always have a retort ready.” FULL- BLOODED. Fleecy —" \s it a full-blooded dog?” Mr. Benstrin—"* Mine crashus ! Downey —"* \t ought to be; I paid a full-blooded dere goes my new fife-tollar hat into price for him. der vater !—— ILL- TIMED, $s JOHNNY, don’t you remember your mother told you not to do that ?” Johnny —" \'en not remembering that to-day.” Copyright by B. J. Fath. JUDGE'S FAVORITES, EMMA CALVE. Child of the south ! return to us, bringing The song and the passion of Latin land— Song that the nightingale sighs in its singing To hearts that listen and understand. Come to us. Calvé superba / flinging ‘Gilts of the gods with a lavish hand, JESTING PHYLLIS, OW, Phyllis is a clever girl, And I am rather slow. She likes to keep me in a whirl, 5 To tell me things that startle so : | A f iy] e I think that I shall crazy go— Dat ool dloks 1 vas goin’ ter \ oe And then she laughs, the naughty girl! reward him !" _ \ 1 My name is James. She calls me ** Jim.” Indeed, | jump with fear Whene’er she says, with air most prim. For instance—"* James, you are a dear But really, James, for ‘most a year I've loved another, bigger gym !* And I have known the time when she Would wipe her weeping eyes And tell me that she could not see And bid me bring a doctor wise And make all haste—and then surprise Me with a smile. ‘* Love's blind—Jimmy!" WS And yet I like my Phyllis well, ‘And Ta prank can play. I've found that her own eyes will tell When she’s in fun, and give away The joke that her trained lips may say ; And that is why I ne'er rebel. T'm not as stupid as 1 seem, For Phyllis, pretty dear, OUR SLANGUAGE, Who first was part of love's young dream, Bund MAN —** How's everything this morning, Jerry ?” I've caught. 1 know that it is queer, LecLess MAN—'' Oh, I can't kick. How do you feel?” Bat here's the secret, "Let her steer BLIND MAN —" Out of sight.” 2 When love's the barque and life the stream! CHARLES MULPORD RORINSON, THAT DEADLY BANANA-PEEL. It caused a great change of shape in Dinklespiel.