Judge — June 22, 1895 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

402 “HE TEASES WHOM HE LOVES.” She (too pretty to be very clever) —“ Here's the yearly programme for our Minerva club.” He (too clever not to perceive he is in love) —“Ah! You read a paper on Garibaldi, I see?” She (on the defensive)—" Yes. On the tenth of June.” He (guilelessly) —* Garibaldi isn’t his whole name, is it?” She —" Certainly not!” He—" Er—what's the rest of it?” She (fencing) — “You ought to know. He—"I should, of course, if 1 be- longed to the Minerva club, Who was Garibaldi, anyhow ?” She —"|—1—why, a foreigner, of course.” He—"I thought he was a native of Paterson, New Jersey. Quite cele- brated, wasn’t he?” She (with a gleam of confidence)- nor UNcLe Sitas (modestly) —** Wa-al, y trolley line, although we hain’t had nobody THE TRAMP’S REVENGE. Certainly !” He—* What for?” She (beginning to show a becoming flush)—" He was a— a—in politics, wasn’t he?” He had a dim notion that he was a fighter.” She—" Oh!" He—"Do you recollect what he fought for? My memory isn’t "—— She (with bold desperation) —"For freedom, of course. 1 think he fought in the—in the war of 1812." He (with open-mouthed ad- miration) —“ Wonderful. He was quite an infant at that pe- tiod, I believe. Marvelous!” She (with pretty indigna- tion) —"If you know all about it what makes you ask idiotic questions ?” He (meekly)—" When one meets a member of the Minerva club the rare opportunity for in- creasing one’s store of informa- tion should not be overlooked. Was he killed in that war? Sad for one so young !" She (defiantly)—" No!" He— No? Isn't he dead SANDY _Ruopes—'* Said he'd feed his hogs first and tramps later, did he? Now we'll just plug up the pump and git even.” Uncie Reunen —** Well, pump 's run dry. Who would think it this time o° year ?°— —— Now you jest keep a-pumpin’ an’ I'll watch if any — Mrs Dunn— ‘Oh, ho! me FULLY ORDAINED, Currk —"'T hear you've got a trolley line up to your town now 7" She—*" Of course. He's been dead about—about thirty years.” He (with a childlike smile) — “There! and I have been all this time harboring a strange, unreasoning no- tion that he died about 1882. See what it “s to know a member of the” She (on the tremulous verge of tears) —“I—I—I was going to read it all up, of course, before 1 wrote my P I think you're too mean and horrid! T've a good mind to never speak" — He—"To any other fellow but me as long as you live. Thank you, dear. (Getting close possession of her hand.) Have you noticed the mistake in the programme? ‘June the tenth, Garibaldi — Miss Eleanor Pennington.’ That's six months ahead, you know. Do’ you see the glaring error?" She (faintly) —" No." He—" Why, it should read, * Mrs. we've got what they calla Jack Frothingham.’ Shouldn't it, ‘illed yet.” dear?” She (inaudibly, in sweet confusion)—" Oh, Jack !" RAMA A. OFFER. WOULDN'T HAVE TIME, First traveler—* Do you understand this silver question that everybody is talking about ?” Second traveler (emphatically) —" I do not, si First traveler—“ Well, V'll explain it to you, Second traveler —" You'll have to excuse me. You see I'm going to be on this train only seventeen hours.” REGRET. ~ Mavupe—"* What a pity he’s such a woman-hater !" A HARLEM WalL. shanty’s all afoire R Orricer —" The djuce ye can't! Oi hov a kay an the insoide, an’ Oi can't foind me kay to git in.” wid me thot jist fits thot dure, mum.” comicbooks.com