Judge — March 2, 1895 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

4133 EASILY ANGERED. Mrs, Torrtatte—"* Norah, did you tell the janitor that we wanted more heat up here ?* Noxan—" Oi did, mum ; an’ he foired up right away, bad ‘cess t’ his ugly pictur)!” SEIZING THE OPPORTUNITY. HE circulation-affidavit maker of the Datly Hemisphere ran out of ideas, and in his extremity went to church, In the course of the sermon the preacher said, SOMETHING WRONG SOMEWHERE. Farmer Chubbs—" That gal you got frum the city, M’randy, don’t know nuthin’.” M'randy (sadly) — “1 know that, Zach, But she ought to. I got her at one o” them intelligence-offices.” “Think, my brethren, that to-day out of every seven young men in the great cities of this Christian land only one is to be found in church.” And the affidavit-maker hastened home and worked And in the nest issue there were statements, duly sworn to, showing that the other six stayed hometo | Sc] 3<2 read the Daily Hemisphere, and that in the next issue they expected to have the seventh. SUPERFLUOUS, AND NOT REMOVED. _ _ Bvadne—So you have seen Mrs. Beard since her 7 return, And how was she looking ?” Angeline—* Much as usual; as if she hadn't shaved for a week.” SHUNNED BY THE SENTIMENTALISTS, A Jaitcvarden—"\ am beginning to think that perhaps that fel- Acow.sur, '0W isn't a murderer at all.” Assistant —" On what do you base your belief ?” Jaitewarden—" Why, there hasn't been a single bouquet sent him since his arrest.” A NEW VERSION. Aunt Jerushy (in maple-sugar camp, anxious- ly)—" Samanthy and ’Zekle—where be they ?” Uncle Nehemiah (vigorously stirring the syrup)—" There they be, t'other side o’ that rail fence, a-bilin’ an’ a-coolin’.” A TERRIBLE BLUNDER. —"' Kracious, fader ! vot fur you vhip Shakey so fur “Vhy, der lamp ubset in der shtore und dis fool—dis crazy poy—he pud id oud, so hellup me Aaron !" Mrs. ILamsersti Mr. HAMMERS comicbooks.com