Judge — February 23, 1895 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

assailed him—— HIS VALENTINE, BEHOLD the postman on the go With bags and carts and barrows! While Cupid “s mending up his bow And sorting out his arrows, ‘The fates for once smile on the earth AS if they'd ne'er distrest us— And Venus fair for ail she's worth Is lacing up her cestus. Sweet Flora ‘s hurrying like the deuce, Mid ice and snow that soak us ; She's bravely trying to produce ‘A snow-drop—or a crocus. And all the pretty sylphs and loves, The muses and the graces, Are harnessing their swans and doves And getting in their places. While I—1 rage and sigh and rant Because (this hurt most sore is !) I'm trying hard to write, and can’t, A valentine to Chloris, MADELING 5. BEIDGRS A READY ACQUIESCENCE. Twynn (after setting forth his plans) —"Don't you think my idea ought to be carried out?” Triplett (not favorably impressed) — A COOL DEFENSE, Mr. Suburb was totally unarmed when the bold highwayman HE DIDN'T ANSWER HER. ON S. VALENTYNE HYS DAYE. YE NARDE-UPPE ONE 15 COMFORTED. NO GYFTE I have to give you, sweetinge, Humble things alone be mine ; Yet there's joye as deare as fleetinge When lippes with lippes be meetinge (Just by way of saintlie greetinge), On ys daye of Valentyne. one A SIGN OF PEACE, Sunday - school teacher —" When George Washington's father forgave him for cutting down the cherry-tree what les- son did it teach?” Little Johnnie—" That he had buried the hatchet.” A WOMAN'S WAY. Cobwigger—" There's a chance that you, might recover the watch if you re- member the number of it.” Mrs, Cobwigger —"Oh, is that ‘so, dear? 1 once wrote the number down on a little bit of paper, as you suggested.” Cobwigger—" Where did you put it?” Mrs. Cobwigger—" Why, in the back of the watch.” Miss Soputa—'*I declar’, Mistah Jobnsing, whad fo’ yo’ “Yes—and buried.” walks way out dere in de street fo’? I neber seed-sech a man.” ON EVIDENCE, JOHNNIE (aged seven) on one occasion was very untruthful and was told the story of the little boy who never told a lie. “Ob. 1 know who he was," said Johnnie. “George Washington, the first president of the United States, They haven't much of a man in the chair now.” “Who do you mean?” was asked. “Why, Grover Cleve- land, of course. “What do you know of him?” “1 have no personal acquaintance with him; it’s only hearsay.” There is more history OUT OF WO: to be made than ever was A study in expression, written, GETTING DOWN TO BUSINESS comicbooks.com