Judge — February 9, 1895 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PHILOSOPHY. DAT, poverty am no disgrace I's often hyuel ‘em say But it hab its inconveniences, | feels ‘em eb ry day. My only comfort’s thinkin’, while I labors wif de ax, Dat 1's got no room ter worry ‘bout de in. come tax. I bites away on hoe-cake, | ut T hankers arter pie ; T has eaten col’ pertaters wif a melon-patch neah by ; But I cheers merse’f in spite ob all dese melancholy fac’s "Cause I's got no room ter worry “bout de in- come tax. EPISCOPAL WIT. THE Right Reverend William Croswell Doane, bishop of Albany, told this story the other evening at his own dinner-table. He was called upon to baptize a baby, several years ago, on one of his episcopal vis- itations in the Adirondacks, and the mother moreover beg- ged the privilege of naming the child for him, This favor was accorded. Not long ago he vi ping. son?” The reply Raves (the candidate, day before election, Mr O'Arien | Congratulate new baby up to my house.” eee yiz named it yit, sor?” ancs—" Ves Got the name all picked out for it—Patrice O Connell Bangs.” Bamcs (seven a. 9.)—"Ah, Mr, Isaacstein ! Congratulate me! We've yot'a new baby up to my how him » Be Bangs w— "Ach! An’ vot vill you call “ him, Brother Bangs?" nes —" Got it all fixed is the way he'll be know! Hello, Colonet Did you bear wash! “Did Me, W Ant . yo" gwine y m, sul Bancs—" Oh, ance" Jefferson Davis Bangs; my jg good enough for me." wife insists on it ted the same region again and saw a little fellow playing about the house where he was stop- In his usual kindly manner he called the boy to him and inquired of him, “ What is your name, my The senior bishop of the United States, John Williams of Connecticut, is an old bachelor. the most genial and charming of men he has never displayed much sympathy with women nor with matri- mony, and it is one’of his stock grievances that the young men of his Berkeley divinity school marry as soon as they are ordained. As he puts it, “As soon as they get a gown they think they must have a petticoat.” od what will you name Baxcs—"" Regular old Puritan names, of course—Eli Ephraim Bangs."” Bancs (eleren a. m.)—" Hello, Mr, ‘vou hear about my new kid ?”” ‘oln-Grant-Garrett Bangs IT WAS A GIRL, AFTER ALL. more rete =Merey valy the he dares own shad dad tone & Sons, | Aliss ( ception erything Why, Boston Natur sopalar. ssattrac ROUBLES NEVER COME SINGLY. Mrs. JAcKsox—"t Ya-as indeed, Mrs. ‘Thom'son, I does has mah trials. Why, on'y yest'day, w'en dat new pahson wuz ‘bout ter propose t’ mah 'Tildy, de ole man cum home drunk an’ mah Z Ike, dun got inter a fight wid each odder an’ Zeb frew a brick troo de winder jes’ as de jailer wuz "bout ter ‘rest de ole man, an’ de pahson in his hurry ter git away fergot. “pout d° proposal, Mrs. was prompuf given, “Bishop Doane!” ‘ene ougl JUDGMENTS. ALE things come half way to the man who can’t wait too long. Diversity of opinion a should never breed hatred; ing.” it does though. A man with unflinching “ Iherence to a purpose can and half control his destiny. cal | There are plenty of phie losophers who can stand trib- ulation, but not vexation. and It does not always do to ing. make a small start; some- = timesa good Lluff does better. The “Worst of an un- heroic lifes thav it affords no taste; of the luxury of self forgetfulness. Be like glass and draw the sunshine of happiness Then let it shine through you upon others. A good many men go around preaching “Trust to Providence,” whose wives do dress - making and keep boarders. Got a brand-new bal ‘Stock ,o~- Bow go through life?” Baxcs—" As Van-Rensselaer-K nick ® “The age of chivalry is ‘a never past,” wrote Kingsley ; 3 but, Charles, how about these days of female bicycles, bloomers and_ ballots? There is no reason why a woman should not seek the society of men if she prefers it; but let her see to it that she behaves herself like a gentleman. Bancs (home, twelve noon) who do ‘baby look like? Mary—" Och, sure sor, she's th’ perfic’ pic- ¢ mother.”” Well, Mary, Sah; no, sah. Wot MADELINE OnvIS, comicbooks.com