Judge, 1894-03-24 · page 6 of 16
Judge — March 24, 1894 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces typical of late 19th-century American humor: **"Clean Enough"**: A tramp retorts to a policeman's insult by noting he's just been run over by a street-sweeper—making him cleaner than the cop. Social commentary on class and dignity. **"The Beginning of a Schism"**: Clergy humor mocking a rector who accepts full-immersion baptism but objects to the woman wearing a practical diving suit—absurd prudishness about women's bodies. **"Bless the Coquettes"**: An Irish-accented poem (phonetically rendered) praising flirtatious women for extending courtship opportunities and romantic variety among young men. **"A Slight Misunderstanding"**: Western frontier violence humor where a card player threatens to punch someone over an alleged insult. **"The Most Popular"**: Mock-serious joke about college priorities: a son chose "athletics and fraternities" over academics. **"The Wily Chinaman"**: Title promises content but appears incomplete on this page. The page emphasizes class satire, romantic comedy, and ethnic humor (Irish, Chinese) typical of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
CLEAN ENOUGH. Pouiceman—'' Come, move on, you dirty tramp!” Tramp (who has just been run over by street-sweeper)—" Don't git gay, Who's had a cleanin’ last—me or you? See?” now! THE BEGINNING OF A SCHISM. S MELINDA and the rector have had a serious difference.” “Tell me about it.” “Well, she insisted on being mersed.” “The rector didn’t oppose that, did he?” “No; but he objected to her wearing a water-tight diver’s suit.” rr im- THE WILY CHINAMAN AND THE BLESS THE COQUETTES. 1 OFTEN tink whin, link be link, Me moind in ritroshpiction loike Takes up th’ days whin all me ways Was bloomin’ wid affiction loike, What little show Oi'd had t' know Of billin’ an’ of cooin’, shure, If no coquettes, th’ darlin’ pets, Had lived t shpoice th’ wooin’, shure. Supposin’ now that Molly Gow, Th’ cute an’ coy Killarney maid, Had towld me yis whin Oi did priss Me shuit an’ lots o' blarney made, What chance wud Oi hov had t' troy, In dacint-loike propriety, Th’ shparkin’ shwates an’ taty-tates Oi had wid Nell Moriaty? An’ thin, bedad ! if Nellie had, Acknowled; th’ charrums of me, Bat chose t’ vint her heart's consint Be shnugglin’ in th’ arrums of me, "Twud made me miss th’ afther bliss Of coortin’ many a gal 3 Th’ Dolan twins, th’ Misses Flynns, An’ witchin’ Judy Bralligan. ‘An’ besht of all, whin Oi recall ‘That but for their philandtherin’ Oi'd losht th’ mate that crowns me fate (This planet howlds no grander in), Me heart o'erbrims wid chuneful hymns Of thribute fasht accruin’, shure, T" bless coquettes, th’ darlin’ pets, That lengthen days o' wooin’, shure. WADE WHIPPLE. THE MOST POPULAR. S6\YVHAT course did your son take in college?” “Athletics and fraternities.” A “SLIGHT” MISUNDERSTANDING. Eastern sport—'' Eureka! You had no left bower for my ace.” CATAMOUNT JiM (drawing)—" Naw; but I got a right bower fer yer face, an’ T'll player too ef yer don't take back what yer sed ‘bout me bein’ a ‘ reeker’!" 1. The real size of the pimple on Mr, Sensitiveman’s nose. 2. The size it seemed to him before he reached his office. SMALL. boy. comicbooks.com,