Judge — February 10, 1894 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Paxson Jonson PARSON JOHNS Listen, chilluns, while I tells yo" a true ghos'- story. Larsd night, ‘bout twelve o'clock, as I was a-gwine pars de ber- ryin'-groun'— HARD LUCK. as a carpet-dance shortly after. New-year’s at Felicia’s house and Felix was at it. They had not been engaged very long or Felix would have known how to dance before this even- ing and Felicia’s pretty toes and sophis- ticated slippers would not have suffered. But she was heroically in love and bore everything, even to her brother's com- ments. It was a very small dance and the guests became interested in Felix's progress. ‘They gathered in twos and ones about the lesson, and Fe brother offered kindly suggestions. Start on the other foot, Felix.” Felix made a few false motions and *remarked facetiously that he must have left that foot at home. A sympathetic ripple ran about the circle and presently the music lured each member of it away. ortwo in an unex, at’a smile of enj affair.indeed. Up and down they flew, Felici learned, aiid only a polka would he dance. BUSINESS TERMS. “A double entry. Then. Felix waxed bolder and taking Felicia in = shis'arms he made a determined dash down the. centre 6f the room. The musicians lost a note ined way. ‘The others gave theni lf honored passage and Felicia’s attempts yment were of a type which made mediaval martyrdom a very second-rate 's fixed smile gradually becoming, as she after- wards expressed it, like that of the famous cat—all that was left of her. Unwary men received Felix’s elbows between their ribs, in their eyes, anywhere, and ruffled damsels clutched their hair-pins-despairingly. The music chanced to be a waltz, but it was a polka Felix-had partly At length, through sheer exhaustion and the com-" bined efforts of the last irate couple they had bumped into, they stopped and: Felicia sank resignedly into a chair. Vell," said Felix complacently, “I think I started on the right foot that time.” “Well, hardly, old man,” observed thre brother, pleasantly, “for you started on my foot.” Somebody laughed, but it was neither Felix nor Felicia. “Tt was a clear walk-over all through,” he went on in the tone of one who offers con- gratulations. Felix smiled absently, but his recent success fully occupied his thoughts, Isn't it delightful to dance together?" he whispered to Fe- licia. “ But do you know, dear, I don’t believe your step exactly suits mine. Would you mind if 1 tried the next with some one else?” GUOST-STORY. —Swhad I done saw dar, a-sittin’ on a grabe-stone — And to this day Felix does not un- derstand why Felicia wished that night to break off the engagement. TO A YOUNG POET. TWAS" Trifles Lightas Air” you took As title for your new-born book. I've read it, and, no one will doubt it, The title’s the best thing about it. IN ITS PURITY. Mr. New (in coffee-stall of French market, New Orleans, six a, m.)— “ Now, my dear wife, it was really worth our while to come all this distance at this hour, for this is the only place we can hear the real Creole French, Lin- guists say it is the purest French "— 4. Voice (from. tiext stall) —“ Now, pluvy the divvil don't that Frinch. nay- guic-cime along wid thim Cakes GRATITUDE, Reverenp OLpnoy (captured by Indians)—"* What ! Is it possible” +. T have the pleasure of meeting my old Harvard pupils in ancient theo whom I have not seen for ten years?” Lele eto MAN-AT-THE-POOT-OF-HIS-CLASS (sfoically) —"* Reckon you're right, professor. We were going to skin you alive, but, seeing its you, we'll give you the benefit of a Christian death by hanging.” comicbooks.com