Judge — November 25, 1893 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE THE MODERN SUNDAY NEWSPAPER. UY the Earth next Sunday. It will be a corker. articles on politics, art, science or religion. Every story new, striking, and the product of individual experience. few samples: A reporter did not drink any whisky one day last week. will describe his feelings in next Sunday's Earth. No played-out Here are a He A young-lady reporter chewed tobacco and spit on the floor of a Broadway car a few days ago. and how other people seemed to feel in next Sunday's Earth. A circulation-department man told the truth the other day. feels in next Sunday's Zarth. A reporter had himself kicked from the post-office to Chatham square recently. He will tell you all about it in next Sunday's Harth. A proof-reader gave up swearing for one dai next Sunday's Earth, A man who writes cooking-recipes had a square meal last Monday. picture his feelings in an interesting article in next Sunday's Earth. A young-lady reporter put on stage-whiskers and had them shaved off. She wil tell the Earth's readers next Sunday how a woman feels under the razor. He wil Ww. L moxpon, Ai ‘ \\ 4A AT THE WASHINGTON RACES. **T just got a dead straight tip on Jersey Lightning for de fourt’ event !" How'd ye catch on? * T overheard one gent tell annuder gent dat he heard Jockey MeMud’s valet tell Jockey McSweat’s valet dat he heard Mr, Morse tell Bookmaker Fiynn dat ‘Trainer Magin told Trainer Mazann dat "— Srort—" Well, well! Dat horse can't lose.” ADVANTAGE OF HARD TIMES. He—* I's too much to pay it reall She—*1 got a high-priced pattern on purpose, love. Nobody pay ay for a dress-pattern, my dear his bills TERRIBLE. WITH a despairing ery the young girl threw herself on the couch and, giving way utterly to the frenzy of grief that racked her being, sobbed as if her heart would What is it, my darling ?" tenderly asked her loving mother as she bent over the prostrate form of the beautiful creature. “Alas !" she sobbed, making a supreme effort to control herself, “Tam ruined, He forgot to put any pockets in my bicycle trousers,” She will tell how she felt He will tell how it He will describe his feelings in i I REALISM. * What yer readin’? * Dare-devil Dan ; or, De Dangerous Dago.'” “Is he any use?” Well, s-a-y! It takes ninety-eight chapters ter in’ he comes near gittin’ soaked fer keeps most every A GAY WIDOW’S SUBTERFUGE. T widow that Jack has fallen in love with is trifling with him, I think.” No. Jack say she loves him.” Why doesn’t she marry the fellow, then ?” he's an orphan and won't marry without her mother-in law's consent.” she receives all his presents graciously and ANOTHER CATASTROPHE. Mrs. Householder ever is the matter down there, Nora Nora (replying through tube)—"Arrah! Worra, worra, mum! Oi've shpult th’ fill av a big toob av wather ahl oover th’ flure an dhrownded me kitchen intoirely an’ nearly half kilt mesilf!” A MISFIT, “Hey, here's ten cents to shut your mouth.” Golly, ‘golly, marse! dat's too small to stop mouf is a half-a-dollar mouf, hit is,” comicbooks.com